Wayne Rooney waxed his chest, failed at the World Cup

Carter Daly

Just in case you hadn't heard, Wayne Rooney didn't have such a great World Cup. England's star striker finished with a less than impressive tally of zero goals in South Africa as the Three Lions crashed out of the tournament in the round of 16 after being "Muellered" by Germany. There have been many theories as to why Roo didn't quite perform up to his 34-goal Manchester United season for the English national team at the World Cup. Some say it was the crippling pressure and expectations from home, others say his injured ankle still wasn't quite right after a long season in all competitions with the Red Devils. Then there's the Daily Mail, which claims it's all down to Wayne's World Cup chest waxing:

As he trudged off the field after swapping shirts at Bloemfontein yesterday following the 4-1 annihilation by Germany that ended England's interest in the finals, he showed a chest devoid of hair.

Rooney is normally seen with a much hairier chest and for yesterday's match he had also abandoned his normal stubble for a clean-shaven look.

He looked tired, his first touch was poor and one wild shot on the run ended embarrassingly wide of the target.

Now, I haven't been paying particular attention to Wayne Rooney's body grooming habits, but I did find it a little peculiar that Roo was looking like an exhausted pasty seal-pup after exchanging his red England away shirt with the German enemy on sunday. Especially when you realize that he's been known to sport an epic neck-beard (a "neard") with a thickness resembling a ginger wool turtleneck. Who would have ever imagined Shrek to be so high maintenance?

I don't know if he went for a mani-pedi after that maitnence process or if he was simply just trying to increase his on-pitch aerodynamics, but Wayne wasn't quite the king of the jungle without his lion's mane in South Africa.

Next time embrace your manhood, Wayne, and if the press is to be believed the goals will be sure to follow.

Photo: Daily Mail

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