I finally did it! I signed a contract with Bayern Munich and I can't wait to start playing for the greatest club in the world...just six short months from now. Until then, I remain with Borussia Dortmund, counting the days like a child looking forward to the release of a new Woody Allen film.
I remember last year when Mario Gotze's deal with Bayern was announced before the season ended, the Dortmund fans didn't treat him very nicely over the remainder of his stay, diary. They jeered him and called him bad names and I think someone even tried to frame him for a panda murder. But based on nothing in particular, I'm confident that they won't do any of that to me. To be honest, I don't even really like pandas. Sorry, diary.
Since my deal with Bayern has been announced even earlier in the season than Gotze's, I'm sure everyone from the fans to my teammates will be far more willing to understand my point of view. It's been my experience that other people are always very willing to put aside their own interests and desires out of respect for mine. For example, I've had several dreams this week alone where Dortmund fans came up to me in the streets and said, "Congratulations, Robert. We'll still root for you even though you're going to the club that is currently making our lives a living hell. Oh and by the way, we made you a cake in the shape of the Champions League trophy you will probably win once you arrive there." And since I dreamt it, that's exactly how it will happen. After all, I dreamt I would play for Bayern and now I'm only six months away from that happening. So you can't argue with the logic, diary. You just can't.
Anyway, I'll be sure to keep you posted on all the wonderful farewell gestures the people of Dortmund offer me in our remaining time together. Some people might think that I won't try as hard for Dortmund now, but I am eager to show Bayern that they made the right choice in signing me. So every goal I score between now and the end of the season will be dedicated to them. If that doesn't put the minds of Dortmund fans at ease, then I don't know what will.
Hugs and kisses,
P.S. I'm not really going to hug and kiss you, diary, because you're just a diary. Haha!
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