All the hilarious new FIFA 14 goal celebrations in one handy video

Brooks Peck
Dirty Tackle

The release of FIFA 14 is just two weeks away and the game's demo is already out, so prepare gamers for the imminent arrival of the game they'll play on breaks from GTA V, EA Sports released a tutorial video for all the new goal celebrations in the game. And even if you have no intention of playing FIFA 14, it's still worth watching for sheer entertainment value.

In addition to Gareth Bale's trademarked heart hands, Cristiano Ronaldo's bear hands AND "calm down" (sadly, the thigh point was not included) plus Lionel Messi's "point to the sky," there are also a variety of new comedy celebrations.

There's the chicken dance, "muevelo," and even Congo goalkeeper Muteba Kidiaba's bum dance (which EA calls "riding the cat"). Then there's the more intricate "Le Cirque Labelle" and patty cake (performed by Mesut Ozil in an Arsenal kit) among others.

With these additions, many hours will be spent scoring goals just to do the new celebrations. But if you try to perform Bale's heart hands with Cristiano Ronaldo, the real Cristiano will show up at your door within the hour and slap you in the face. Consider this a warning.

What to Read Next