Future News: Man United to screen Hollywood films at Old Trafford during matches

Brooks Peck
Dirty Tackle

With a 15-point lead in the Premier League and just nine matches left to play, Manchester United have announced an innovative new plan to retain the interest of fans through the end of the season. During each of their last four home matches, including those against second-place Man City and third-place Chelsea, Man United will project Hollywood films on a large screen above the pitch at Old Trafford. The club says the objective is to provide ticket holders with a substitute form of drama and entertainment now that their record 20th league title is a foregone conclusion.

"We're pleased to be in the position we're in," Man United manager Sir Alex Ferguson told reporters at a press conference to announce the decision. "You never get tired of winning the league, but to have it all wrapped up this early, we understand that people might lose interest to some degree. So we'll be showing films during the matches to help keep everyone's interesting. I think during the Man City match we'll be showing a film called You Got Served, then for Aston Villa we'll do Apocalypse Now, for Chelsea we'll have Run Fatboy Run and for Swansea there will be The Silence of the Lambs."

Last season, Man United lost the title to rivals Man City in spectacular fashion on the final matchday. Though the Red Devils are pleased to be in a much more comfortable situation this season, they are still sensitive to the criticism that this has been a comparatively boring campaign.

"If our lead reaches the level of Bayern's," Ferguson continued, referencing Bayern Munich's 20-point lead atop the Bundesliga, "we'll paint Wayne Rooney green and have him do the entire Shrek series as a one-man show. If that doesn't give people their money's worth, then I don't know what will."

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