Future News: Jose Mourinho plans victory parade through Barcelona

Brooks Peck
Dirty Tackle

Having opened up a 10-point advantage over second-place Barcelona, Real Madrid manager Jose Mourinho has begun organizing a victory parade through the Catalan capital to celebrate his club's first La Liga title since 2008. Though the parade will not go off until the end of the season in May, Mourinho has already started making unprecedented arrangements to hold a title celebration in a rival city.

"Some people say, 'Jose, why not have parade in Madrid with Madrid fans?' And to that I say shut up," Mourinho told Spanish sports paper Marca when asked about his plan. "We will have parade through Barcelona. I will take refreshing shower in Sergio Busquets' tears while laughing at UNICEF children. I can't wait."

FC Barcelona, the winners of the last three La Liga titles, have lodged a complaint with the city over Mourinho's plans. But the Real Madrid manager has already obtained the necessary permits for a parade route that will weave through the city and end at the Camp Nou three days after it begins. The entire team will ride atop a float shaped like Real Madrid winger Jose Maria Callejon.

Mourinho also says that several prominent members of the Catalan club will be invited as "guests of honor."

"Leo Messi can come. We made a baby-sized Ronaldo shirt for him to wear. [Gerard] Pique can come and bleed on Shakira's shoulder. [Pep] Guardiola can come, too. I will even present him with a wig made of my hair that he can wear to feel more special. It will be beautiful."

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