After training with Barcelona and showing off his Real Madrid shirt earlier this year, teenage cash generator Justin Bieber brought his footballing skills to Stamford Bridge while filming a television special. There, he met with Frank Lampard and Fernando Torres. The following is a transcript of what was said while Bieber put on his freestyling exhibition.
Lampard: Who is this kid?
Torres: Shh! You must be quiet and smile! He preys on our fear...I have heard of him. He is the Justin Bieber. The greatest Canadian footballer. He is obviously here to take one of our jobs. I knew this day was coming!
Lampard: I thought he was a singer or something. My daughters know about him.
Torres: He tries to sing, but he makes girls scream when he does it. So the Canadian government sent him to Europe to play football. First he was in Barcelona, but the girls -- they screamed there too. Now he is here.
Lampard: I really don't think-
Torres: You will not take my job Justin Bieber! You are clearly better than me at football, but I have the better hair! Haha!
Lampard: Calm down, Fernando. Look at the size of him. I really don't think that's why he's here.
Torres: I am looking at him! Kicking the ball where he intends to. Wearing a full kit with his name on it. I saw him score a goal earlier, too. He's rubbing it in my face!
Lampard: He's just having a bit of fun...
Torres: Well I am not! That's it. I'm going back into the dressing room and then I'm going to draw a pen mark on his shoes.
Torres: Nothing. ... I like your socks.
Here's video of Bieber's visit, including the moment he called Frank Lampard "neither foot[ed]" (but not including the moment Lampard had David Luiz punish him for saying that)...