Liverpool's Melwood training ground is a sanctuary of cutting-edge fitness development and fastidiously constructed dietary regimes, so naturally it was chosen as the venue for a celebrity cake baking competition to raise awareness of the Children in Need charity.
In a clip filmed for BBC children's TV show Blue Peter, Charlie Adam — who knows his way around a cake — took on striker Andy Carroll, who either has the thickest Geordie accent on the planet or is still drunk from breakfast (I'm English and I still can't figure out what he's trying to say at [1.39] in the clip). It's surely the first instance of food preparation that Carroll or Adam have had to embark on in many years, and boy does it show. Liverpool's canteen has never served food that terrible looking to any of the staff — even Rafa Benitez after the club moved his desk into the car park.
The bake off is surprisingly tense and humorless for a charity event, and the final decision is left to teammate and part-time cake judge Pepe Reina. The Spaniard isn't usually allowed near large kitchen knives, but he resists the urge to wrestle control of the blade and astutely declares Andy Carroll's imaginative football-shaped treat to be the winner.