On March 21, 2006, the first message ever posted on Twitter arrived from founder Jack Dorsey. Since then, an estimated 425 billion tweets have followed, with an estimated 10 of them positively contributing to the well-being of humanity.
Topsy, a social analytics company that mines the web for news, has recently offered a way to comb through those tweets all the way back to Twitter’s humble beginnings, when it was a bunch of tech heads and Will Wheaton telling us what they had for lunch.
The search feature digs up messages from seven years ago, offering a snapshot at the opinions, discourse and snark at a given moment.
So we decided to unleash this technological time-waster on the National Hockey League, attempting to discover hockey’s Twitter pioneers and what they were saying about topics ranging from Sidney Crosby to the Stanley Cup during the social media service’s infancy.
C’mon … don’t you want to know which rocket surgeon made the first ‘Cindy Crosby’ joke on Twitter?
Join us, won’t you, for a look back at hockey infamy …
The methodology is simple: We used the Topsy search engine and set the dial to oldest first. We ignored any auto-tweets from media companies and aggregaters, and focused on actual human beings (we assume) using Twitter in the way-back-when.
Again, these are the first people to ever mention these topics on Twitter. The Neil Armstrongs of hockey social media!
And here ... we ... go.
Seven full-on fights? Those were the days ...
Giovanni seems confused.
Yes, it was six years ago that a 'Scarface' parody account professed its admiration for the Leafs.
Oh, if only there were still ties, Spencer McManus. If only ...
Why didn't McCain ever bring up that Gretzky age thing during the debates? Meanwhile, isn't there another Gretzky that's Twitter famous? Oh yeah:
Translation: "Paulina Gretzky takes scantily clad Instagram selfies." We assume.
We figured the first mention of Chara would have either been about his shot or his height. And it was his shot.
Ovechkin vs. Crosby. ON NBC?! No way.
"Crybaby" and "Pens" in the same sentence circa 2007 did not yield the anticipated result. Speaking of which ...
Yeah, but he could bring the whine, amitrite Flyers fans?!?!
Oh, it wasn't all sunshine for Sid.
Ah, the origins of an emasculating meme. But Crosby wasn't alone in the Twitter snark. See also:
Wonder if that Machinehead/Blue Jackets victory correlation was ever scientifically proven. See also:
The "Cansucks" never really caught on. See also:
We would have been very disappointing if our friends Loser Domi and PPP weren't around at the damn of the this hefty trending topic. See also:
Mike Milbury approves of these messages. Speaking of which ...
Matt's still on Twitter (and a Puck Daddy reader) so be sure to bug him about wanting Milbury to coach the Bruins instead of Claude Julien, OK?
Complaining about your tax dollars funding Don Cherry: a time-honoured tradition.
Hey, remember when the Internet talked about Sean Avery dating women?
The first recorded instance of Brendan Shanahan's suspension whimsy. And finally ...
Some things never change.