Report: Jessica Welch files for divorce from Dustin Penner; custody of pancakes to be determined

Dustin Penner is not the first NHL player to get divorced, nor is he the first NHL player whose divorce became TMZ fodder — ask Sheldon Souray about that.

But the gossip site's report that his wife Jessica Welch, formerly married to Richard Zednik, filed for divorce in Los Angeles citing "irreconcilable differences" has us questioning our own love … of pancakes.

Welch is the one who made Penner the "delicious pancakes" that led to the most surreal hockey injury in recent memory. She helped him get dressed after that flapjack-related ailment, so he could go the rink for treatment. It was all one Jason Mraz song away from being a montage in a rom-com.

But alas, it couldn't last. You see, marriage is like a pancake: One minute you're neatly stacked on top of each other and covered in sticky sweetness; the next you're soggy and falling apart, your home becoming a gelatinous soup of what used to be. (Also, both marriages and pancakes are made exponentially better with the addition of bacon. We believe science has confirmed this.)

On a serious tip: This always sucks, and our best wishes go out to both of them. And while there's nothing that formally backs this up: Maybe there was more to Dustin Penner's slump than hockey-related matters. At least recently, when Darryl Sutter demanded he work his ass off during a series of healthy scratches. More here from Life In Hockeywood.

The Royal Half has a look at the Penner/Welch wedding, for nostalgia's sake. (Also from The Royal Half: "Trust me there is no coincidence that Dustin Penner's wife leaves him the minute Jeff Carter joins the team.") Luckily for Penner, the Kings have already played their game against the Buffalo Sabres this season, so he won't have to hear 60 minutes of Pat Kaleta's best divorce material.

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