Evgeni Malkin’s chop on Staal; Duncan Keith proud of injuring Daniel Sedin? (Puck Headlines)

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Here are your Puck Headlines: a glorious collection of news and views collected from the greatest blogosphere in sports and the few, the proud, the mainstream hockey media.

• We have to sound two alarms for next Monday: First, the hockey on a popular network sitcom alarm, as Luc Robitaille will be on “How I Met Your Mother.” Which brings us to the other alarm, which is that he’ll be discussing ROBIN SPARKLES.

• Duncan Keith with either the biggest swagger moment of the Chicago Blackhawks vs. Vancouver Canucks rivalry or the biggest ‘missing word in a sentence changes the meaning of everything’ moment. Quoted by the Province, on his hit on Daniel Sedin: “I think, for the most part, I’m a pretty honest player,” Keith said. “Obviously, I got suspended and I was punished for that, you know, so that’s something obviously, I’m very proud of.” WHHHAAAA?! [Province]

• Elliotte Friedman on the Phoenix Coyotes ownership situation: “Last year, several reports indicated there were four locations the team could move to -- Kansas City, Las Vegas, Quebec City or Seattle. Sources say that didn't happen (I was one of the guys who reported that, too), but now that the lockout is over, this is the one ‘must-deal-with’ on NHL commissioner Gary Bettman's list. When does he finally say enough is enough?” [CBC Sports]

• Is Portland Winterhawks owner and Calgary oil mogul Bill Gallacher part of the new group seeking to buy the Coyotes? [Fox Sports Arizona]

• Ten more years of Gary Bettman getting booed during the Stanley Cup Final? [Sportsnet]

• Scott Burnside on Bettman: “In a series of independent studies commissioned by the NHL, hockey fans are wildly optimistic about the league's future. This, despite the obvious concerns: soft spots with franchises in Florida and other Southern-expansion markets; the ongoing ownership fiasco in Phoenix, as the league has run the Coyotes for nearly four seasons and has had trouble selling the team; ownership struggles past and present in New Jersey, Tampa, Long Island and St. Louis; a failed return to Atlanta; and reports that as many as one-third of NHL teams are losing money. But there are also the positives of emerging markets like Seattle that covet an NHL team and a possible second team in the Toronto area (the city of Markham approved funds to build an NHL-style arena north of the city this week), plus plans to build an NHL-capable arena in Quebec City in the hopes of seeing the league return to the historic city, not to mention a 10-year, $2 billion contract with NBC.” [ESPN]

• Great stuff here from Sarah Kwak on the NHL and the NHLPA looking at an Ambien abuse problem from the players. [SI]

• How to fix Alex Ovechkin at 5-on-5. [Japers]

• Shawn Thornton is out 7-10 days with a concussion for the Boston Bruins. [ESPN Boston]

• Ottawa Senators goaltender Craig Anderson, San Jose Sharks left wing Patrick Marleau and Buffalo Sabres left wing Thomas Vanek have been named the NHL's "Three Stars" for the month of January. [NHL]

• Drew Stafford’s elbow on Dougie Hamilton was pretty nasty. [Puck Drunk Love]

• The New Jersey Devils’ replacement for Zach Parise? Oh, just Adam Henrique is all. [Fire and Ice]

• Dallas Stars are scheduled to have Jamie Oleksiak, 20, and Antoine Roussel, 23, in the lineup tonight. [Heika]

• Finally, here’s the Evgeni Malkin stick chop on Marc Staal that had Staal angry and John Tortorella offering a “no comment” today:

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