Alex Burrows and Phil Kessel do not get along. This was plain to see the last time the two wingers met, with Burrows mocking Kessel's infamous attempt to chop down John Scott, and Kessel responding by jumping Burrows for one of the unlikeliest fights of all time.
On Saturday night, the two foes met again in the Canucks' seventh straight loss (and their first to Toronto in over a decade). Their feud only escalated.
And by escalated, I mean devolved into childish hair-pulling:
You've got to hand it to Alex Burrows. The last thing most people think when they look at Phil Kessel is "I want to pull his hair". He's not exactly rocking a fresh head of salad.
Here's the full sequence. Watch closely for the hair-pull at about the eight-second mark:
Pretty weak hair pull, if you ask me. If you're gonna grab a chunk, you'd better leave with a chunk, in my opinion.
And fighting Phil Kessel while wearing a full face-shield is hardly the way to tell the rest of the league you're a tough guy. But it's pretty safe, all things considered, and sometimes safety means not looking cool. Do I look cool in my bike helmet? No I do not. But I still wear it, because safety.
This is hardly the first time Burrows has resorted to schoolyard tactics, let alone this particular one. In a classic melee between the Canucks and Blackhawks from the 2008-09 season, back before Chicago graduated from Vancouver's class, Burrows went at it with defenseman Duncan Keith, whose hair is a great deal more yankable, and yank he did:
Burrows was better at pulling hair back then. Sigh.
Frankly, Burrows was better at everything back then. You can see why he might want to return to the glory days of 2008-09. That was his breakout season, the first time he broke the 20-goal barrier playing with the Sedins. This year, he is on pace for zero, as he has yet to score a single goal this season despite 68 shots over his 28 games. He's clutching the stick pretty hard these days.
And hair, apparently.
A theory: Burrows is struggling mightily. Kessel is playing mightily. Perhaps the hair pull was an attempt to steal some of Kessel's power, like that woman that touched Jesus's robe in the Bible? For Kessel's sake, he'd better hope it doesn't work, or he'll be getting his hair pulled all the time.
s/t to @nothartsy19 for the photo.