Today, we look back at some of this week's poor behavior and nominate one gentleman who has earned the distinctly unappealing task of hand-scrubbing Gilbert Brown's jock strap.
A quick note before we start: Any quotes or actions surrounding the Ines Sainz incident are excluded from the Jock Wash. That's a large list on its own, perhaps a more serious issue than we should get into here, and besides, Brian Baldinger just topped everyone anyway.
With that out of the way, this week's nominees:
Whoever created the Calvin Johnson(notes) rule. Detroit Lions head coach Jim Schwartz is right: Anyone who saw Calvin Johnson catch that football in the endzone knows that Calvin Johnson, well, caught that football. It fits every possible definition of the word "catch", except for the one that the NFL uses. His job is to catch the football, and accordingly, he caught the football. He shouldn't have to get up, cradle the ball gently in his arms and read it a poem before it counts as a catch.
Calvin Johnson. That said, though, if your profession is NFL wide receiver, you should probably take the time to get acquainted with the rules you have to follow. That the rule is moronic, if you're Calvin Johnson, is sort of irrelevant. You're in the NFL, you play by their dumb rules. This falls on the Lions coaching staff, too. It's on you to make sure that your players know what they have to do to complete a catch.
San Diego Chargers fans. You've made four straight playoff appearances, won four straight division titles, and you can't sell out your home opener? What's happening in San Diego? Is someone in San Diego giving away free erotic massages at 1:00 on Sunday? Is everyone staying home to watch the WNBA Finals? Inexcusable. Almost as inexcusable as the fact that the Padres can't draw, either.
Whoever designed the NFL's concussion policy. Remember on Sunday when a a concussed Stewart Bradley(notes) stumbled around the field before falling down helplessly? And then went back into the game, just minutes later? The Eagles apparently did nothing wrong. The NFLPA says they followed all the correct procedures. Since then, though, Bradley has failed every attempt to pass the tests required to get him back on the field, so I think it's fair to ask (again): What's the test Bradley has to pass on the sideline? As long as he's not openly peeing on himself, we're fine? It doesn't make any sense. If he can't pass the test on Thursday, exactly how did he get himself cleared on Sunday afternoon?
And the winner is ...
Chargers fans. It's inexcusable. If the Chargers were perennially awful (something that would not be all together unfamiliar to Chargers fans), it would be one thing, but how much success does a team need to have before people can be bothered to go see them? If you live in San Diego and refer to yourself as a Chargers fan, you can go ahead and spend your Sunday detailing Gilbert's loincloth.