To say Ed Hochuli is verbose is like saying the Washington Redskins offense is pathetic. Mere adjectives don't do them justice. Case in point, Hochuli's unnecessarily-wordy explanation of why a Percy Harvin fumble was, indeed, a Percy Harvin fumble.
Let's take his 63-word explanation line by line:
"The ruling on the field is confirmed."
Killing the suspense right off the bat. If you're going to talk for 20 seconds, at least have us hanging on every word.
"Although there was a hand that continued in by the body as the defender pulled the ball away ..."
Is this the start of some Halloween ghost story? A hand? But whose? And by which body?
"... the defender got possession of the ball and, in fact, ..."
Love the literary flourish. Once he starts getting a little older, expect to here some "herewiths" and "henceforths" and "soothfasts" in Hochuli explanations.
" ... was never touched to the ground until he was completely free of the other player."
This is first NFL ruling ever to take its inspiration from the Magna Carta.
"Minnesota is charged with its first timeout and please reset the clock to 4:41."
Far too many refs get it wrong when they say something like "Carolina is charged with their first timeout. Since the team's city is a collective noun that takes singular verbs and pronouns, and as Hochuli was referring to the Vikings by their home city, the National Football League referee is theron correct in his usage.
Other popular stories on Yahoo! Sports:
• Could Rangers and Cardinals meet in World Series next year?
• Chase watch: 'Smoke' signals he's after top spot
• Tebow throws 100-yard pick-six in forgettable outing