What do you get a millionaire quarterback and a former pageant queen for their wedding? If you were invited to the Memorial Day weekend nuptials of Tony Romo and Candice Crawford, the question was easily answered on the two online registries the couple created at Macy's and Crate&Barrel.
Shutdown Corner has looked through the gift requests, from the Martha Stewart Cupcake Tree to the Double Dip Dish to the Kate Spade New York dessert knife set and jotted down a few of our thoughts:
• As if forcing people to make the trip to Dallas on a three-day weekend wasn't bad enough, the Romos then ask folks to buy them various home knick-knacks that they'll never use and easily could have afforded for themselves? I suppose you have to get a rich guy something when he gets married, I just never figured it would be a six-dollar gravy boat.
Related: Romo wedding features an odd menu
• On the Crate&Barrel registry alone, Romo and Crawford had 150 items from which to choose. One five oh. In retrospect, it may have just been easier to send invitees the spring catalog along with a note saying "send us anything."
• And Crate&Barrel? Really? Was Target closed that day? C&B is a fine store, don't get me wrong. It's just that if you make millions of dollars and are hosting a wedding with hundreds of rich folks in attendance, don't you think you'd walk the extra few steps in the mall to get to a Williams-Sonoma?
• Romo and Crawford asked for cheese plates, cupcake stands, salad bowls, chip and dip holders, and an ice bucket. Those should work out perfect for the Super Bowl party both will be available to host.
• They registered for three tea lights that cost 50 cents each. Dez Bryant is going to get a talking to from his financial manager if he bought the couple the $230 toaster instead of those candles.
• By my count, there were 54 items on the registry that were under $10, including the tea lights, some dishtowels and a small condiment prep cup. Who's so cheap that they spend under $10 on a wedding gift? Bill Bidwell and Mike Brown weren't invited, were they?
• A french fry holder and candle holder were on the registry. Can't say I'm surprised Romo asked for help in holding on to things.
• In the truest sign yet that the lockout has already started affecting NFL players, nobody bought the couple the three most expensive items on the registries: Calphalon cookware ($569), a Dyson vacuum ($549) and Wusthof cutlery ($399). DeMaurice Smith, you only have yourself to blame if and when Romo and Crawford's poorly cut, unevenly cooked dinners fall on the floor and are unable to be picked up by the world's first bagless vacuum.
• At least those dinners will taste good, though. Romo asked for a copy of the book "Recipes Every Man Should Know."
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