After spendin' way too much time watchin' Jon Gruden's "QB Camp," we cree-ated the Coach Gruden Wonderlic exam. Answers are in those eye-talics.
1. Gruden called Andrew Luck and Stanford coach David Shaw "Spider 2 Banana kings." What did he say next?
A. They suffered from potassium overdoses.
B. They're dying of thirst.
C. The Stanford sideline featured a lot of people hilariously slipping on banana peels.
D. There's always money in banana stands.
2. What analogy did Gruden make when showing a video of Luck throwing a crucial interception?
A. "Looks like Jaws shanking a drive on the back nine."
B. "Pulled a Grossman."
C. "A 6-year-old with your hand caught in the cookie jar."
3. When offered dap, Robert Griffin III accepted, then blew it up. Did Gruden reciprocate the fist explosion?
4. How many times did Gruden show a replay of Kirk Cousins putting his hands on his helmet in anguish after a crucial interception?
5. Who did Gruden say should be the best eye manipulator of all time?
A. Andrew Luck
B. Brandon Weeden
C. Brock Osweiler
D. Dr. Boutros, M.D. of The Eye Center
6. What can't Gruden wait to see Case Keenum do?
A. Call a hot route
B. Throw a wet ball
C. Eye manipulate him
D. Become a spider 2 banana king
7. Which movie did Gruden say was like two guys driving the road calling hot routes?
A. "Dumb and Dumber"
B. "Easy Rider"
C. "Midnight Cowboy"
D. "Rain Man"
8. Gruden was most interested in which quarterback's size?
A. Nick Foles
B. Andrew Luck
C. Russell Wilson
9. Complete the following sentence Gruden said to Kellen Moore: "You've had your critics out there that say you don't have enough speed, you don't have prototype size, you don't have a rocket for an arm, but you do have a lot of this. I call it ..."
If you scored between 0 and 3: "Keep studyin' or else you'll be gettin' splinters in your rear."
If you scored between 4 and 6: "All right, rook. Your test discipline could use an increase in correct-answer manipulation, but you're on the right track."
If you scored a 7 or 8: "You're a Spider 2 banana prince with that score."
If you scored 9: "That's why I call this guy [or gal] Einstein."