This and every weekday a.m. until Evan Longoria returns from a broken wrist that has me quite depressed, let's rise and shine together with the doomiest and gloomiest in Major Longoria Baseball. Today's Roll Call starts in St. Petersburg, Fla., where all the old folks refuse to eat their early bird specials at IHOP to honor the fallen third baseman of the eventual World Series champions.
Game of the Day: Astros 3, Giants 1
It should read: Ty Wigginton 3, Giants 1, Longoria three weeks if we're all lucky. The presumptive AL Rookie of the Year out for two weeks (or possibly much longer) after tests revealed his right wrist has a non-displaced (but not non-depressing) fracture. It was busted by an errant J.J. Putz pitch. You just made the list, pal!
Crawford boxed: Carl Crawford also might need season-ending surgery on his hand. This means the Rays best offensive player might be Cliff Floyd, or possibly Toby Hall, who's playing in Chicago. Do your part, fans. Buy Rays bonds, or start a Rays garden, or do some Rays crocheting, to help pass this awful time. Heck, maybe even give Mr. Bonds a call to see what he's up to in his non-retirement.
We're still in first: But it's ringing hollow at the moment.
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Feelin' Rundown (the rest of Monday's Longoria-less action):
Pirates 7, Mets 5: A three-run ninth for the Bucs means nine losses for the Mets in games they've led in the eighth or later. Jerry Manuel needs to install a nanny cam inside the bullpen because the relievers cannot be trusted. Longoria, you could trust.
Red Sox 5, White Sox 1: John Danks takes a no-hitter into the seventh before Kevin Youkilis and J.D. Drew bust it all to smithereens. Just like Longoria's wrist. Josh Beckett, the inhuman beast, doesn't care about Longoria.
Brewers 7, Nationals 1: Cancel that order for a four-man plus-two rotation for the Breu Creu. Yed Nost is going with Dave Bush, both within the Land of Cheese and without. Ryan Braun's back hurts for a second straight day. Not good, not good. But not as bad as Longoria.
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Photo of the Day: Mean Mr. Mustache
Umpire Bill Hohn shows Longoria where he can also buy a sweet paste-on mustache at Shea.
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Nick Markakis (O's) 3-5, 4 RBI, R
Joel Pineiro (Cards) 7 IP, 7 H, ER, 2 BB, 4 K, Win
Brandon Backe (Astros) 7 IP, 4 H, ER, 3 BB, 6 K, Win
Perkins (Twins) 8 IP, 4 H, 3 BB, 4 K, Win
Beckett (Red Sawx) 8 IP, 7 H, ER, 8 K, Win
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Kyle Kendrick (Phils) 3 1/3 IP, 9 H, 7 ER, 3 BB, Loss
Aaron Heilman (Mets) 1/3 IP, 2 H, 3 ER, BB, K, Loss, Blown Save
Verlander (Tigers) 4 1/3 IP, 7 H, 6 ER, 2 BB, 2 K, Loss
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Words of Mouth
"I might start using starters down there." — Manuel, on the Mets 'pen.