This and every weekday a.m., let's rise and shine together with the most recent and decent major league happenings. Today's Roll Call starts at an Applebees near Kauffman Stadium in Kansas City, where Royals outfielder Jose Guillen joined the legion of those who have provided entertaining if profane soundbites by ripping their own team.
Game of the Day: Twins 9, Royals 8 (10 inn.)
Rant 'n' Rave revue: Guillen, no relation to Ozzie, certainly captures the manager's spirit and ensures himself of enshrinement in the Tirade Hall of Fame after KC drops its 10th straight game. The Royals blew a five-run lead on the Twins in the ninth and Justin Morneau added to the misery with a homer in the 10th. It was all Guillen, on his ninth team in 12 seasons, could bear.
Radio ga-ga: "Too many babies here," Guillen said, swearing throughout. "They don't know how to play the game and win the game right, the way it's supposed to be played. And that's the problem here. Now I know why this organization's been losing for a while. Now I know."
Not YOU, Trey Hillman but those other guys: And don't get Guillen started by insinuating that it's the new manager's fault. "He cares more than anyone here about winning," Guillen said. "That guy cares. Every single day. It's killing him. We've just got to be smart and know what we need to do to win games. That's it. There's too many guys that won't do this, do that, like they've given up, like they don't care."
Killed a guy with a trident: Guillen would not name names, so maybe his rant is kind of like that of Brick Tamland who didn't know what the yelling and loud noises were about. But it's not the legitimacy of what was said, it's the heat of the steam released. It's the amount of swearing. It's the quotability. I can't wait for the tape.
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NL Game of the Day: Cubs 2, Dodgers 1 (10 inn.)
Hipity hopity dripity dropity: Alfonso Soriano, cursed by some for dropping a fly ball that would have secured a win at Pittsburgh earlier this week, had the big hit to give the Cubs the win — and series sweep — in the bottom of the 10th. Cubs management reportedly has encouraged — in the form of extra security — Bleacher Bums to take it easy on Soriano, who plays left field.
Turn it inside out: The Cubs also still are dealing with T-shirts that deride the race/ethnicity/English speaking ability of outfielder Kosuke Fukudome. Racism is not only "funny," but also profitable, so this one appears to be going to court. The Cubs don't want the shirts to be sold, period. Not sure if they have legal standing on this (Elias?) but they're going to file some briefs, polish some statutes, talk to some judges, etc.
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Feelin' rundown (Wednesday's other games)
Giants 11, D-backs 3 — Arizona has dropped seven of nine. Recent cancer patient Doug Davis, who got booed at one point for excessive walks, could not stop the D's from dropping seven of nine. The Giants are playing well, but Arizona has dropped seven of nine. What is Bob Melvin going to do about his team dropping seven of nine? Randy Johnson's mullet ought to take responsibility for Arizona dropping seven of nine. Did you guys hear that the D-backs have dropped seven of nine?
Phillies 6, Rockies 1 — Adam Eaton, the Jason Marquis of the Eastern Seaboard, had a reverse Andy Hawkins '85 going — he came in winless in his first 10 starts. Chase Utley is on pace to hit 50 homers, which easily would clear the record of 43, owned by
Rogers Hornsby and Davey Johnson (AP). Utley can do it in that park. Rockies rookie Greg Reynolds walked eight or, as Clint Hurdle put it, "He got outside himself a little." It's a great quote and probably true, even if I don't know what it means.
Mets 7, Marlins 6 (12 inn.) — Fernando Tatis hits a game-ending two-run double. Fernando Tatis? Tatis not only hit two grand slams in an inning once, he had a great year in 1999 as a "24-year-old" for the Cardinals. The dude actually quit in 2004 and 2005 after bottoming out (or so we thought!) with the Expos. Haven't we all bottomed out with the Expos? You'd figure an aging 3B would have little hope of coming up from Triple-A with the Mets because of David Wright. But have you met the Mets? They've got some issues. Maybe Tatis should be playing first instead of Carlos Delgado. What would Gary Carter do?
Reds 9, Pirates 1 — Jay the Bruce: 1-for-3, a run, two walks, a stolen base, two first names. Tom Gorzelanny endured, although not for long (eight batters), a bad night. Right now he needs a friend, or a couch, or a friendly couch. "It's embarrassing to do something like that," Gorzo said. "I've never done this before. I don't know what to say other than I can't believe it."
Brewers 1, Braves 0 — Chipper: 1-for-2, .418. The Braves have lost 18 straight one-run games on the road, which would blow my mind except it's still trying to get around "He got outside himself a little."
Cardinals 6, Astros 1 — Most of the Cardinals rotation has a hangup or two. Age, injury history (and future) or some other deformity curses Todd Wellemeyer, Joel Pineiro, Braden Looper and Kyle Lohse. Not so with Adam Wainwright. He's a just young, healthy starting pitcher who happens to be very good. Must be nice for Dave Duncan to take off half a day with him pitching.
White Sox 6, Indians 5 — Carlos Quentin — you are ridiculous! OK, kidding aside, he's really outside himself right now. Did I use that right? The WSox have beaten the Indians 1,000 times — this season alone, it feels like.
Rays 5, Rangers 3 — So more than 10,000 will show up to the juggernaut's games, Rays fans in Tampa need to tell two friends about their first-place team. And they'll tell two friends, and so on, and so on...
Yankees 4, Orioles 2 — Joba Chamberlain is still soaked, but the Yankees are going to take him out of the dryer and stuff him in the microwave so he's ready to wear before it's too late. But he'll get all wrinkly and smell like fused cardboard and fries!
Tigers 6, Angels 2 — Everyone is telling Jim Leyland that Curtis Granderson's hand is OK. Except, Jim Leyland don't believe it. "The trainers say it's not an issue, but I'm suspicious about whether he's 100 percent," Leyland said. Has Leyland lost it, or does he have X-ray specs? Leyland was forthright about the rectum of Carlos Guillen, so maybe we should cut him some medical slack.
Blue Jays 2, Athletics 1 — Classic duel between Rich Harden (who actually got into the seventh — again) and Roy Halladay (who didn't need to pitch all nine). Alex Rios gets the big hit. Bad Hurt: The MRI looks troubling for Frank Thomas, who was just getting going again at age 40. He'll need some rest on the DL, sounds like, for his leg.
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Photo of the Day: "Let's get out of this heat, I already had a shvitz today."
Angels owner Artie Moreno (right) prepares on Wednesday to announce the 2010 All-Star Game in the O.C. with the assistance of an unidentified blind man.
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Matt Garza (Rays) 8 IP, 4 H, 2 ER, 2 BB, 10 K, Win
Cody Ross (Marlins) 2-4, 2 HR, 4 RBI
Jeff Suppan (Brewers) 8 IP, 4 H, 5 BB, 7 K, Win
Adam Wainwright (Cards) 8 IP, 3 H, ER, BB, 8 K, Win
Marcus Thames (Tigers) 2-4, 2 HR, 4 RBI
Roy Halladay (Blue Jays) 8 IP, 8 H, ER, BB, 9 K, Win
Erik Bedard (M's) 7 IP, 2 H, 3 BB, 8 K, Win
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Tom Gorzelanny (Pirates) 2/3 IP, 4 H, 6 ER, 2 BB, Loss
Doug Davis (D-backs) 5 IP, 9 H, 6 ER, 3 BB, 5 K, Loss
Joe Saunders (Angels) 5 IP, 7 H, 5 ER, BB, 5 K, Loss
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"The fans are missing some really good baseball. Again, having fans in this place will make a difference. Turning this place into `The Pit' will make a difference. The more they show up, I think the better we'll play." — Tampa manager Joe Maddon.