Fashion Ump: Johnson, Soto bring the beard into Wrigleyville

The evolution of men's fashion over the past decade has been hilarious. Remember, it wasn't that long ago that Carson and his pals were turning a bunch of willing dudes metrosexual with "Queer Eye For The Straight Guy." Five years later, we're at a point 180 degrees away with men asking fellow men a simple question:

"How big of a beard can you grow?"

It's no different in the Cubs' clubhouse, where outfielder Reed Johnson is still sporting the Kimbo Slice look we documented earlier this year and catcher Geovany Soto is testing the other limits of male comfort by growing a beard that has to be covered with a mask for at least nine innings a day. He is a brave man, one obviously not afraid of sweat.

Fashion Ump ruling: Back-to-back jacks

Check out this week's other Fashion Ump calls below:

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Speaking of facial hair, what in the name of Gen. Ambrose Burnside does former Cub Jason Marquis have going on here? Is it a mustache? A goatee? An embryonic beard? I'm not asking him to tip any pitches, but c'mon J, pick a style and stick with it.

Fashion Ump ruling: Triple play, end of inning

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At first, I noticed the picture of Pirates pitcher Ross Ohlendorf on the right because his facial expression was making his facial hair look weird. But then I saw the picture on the left — taken almost two weeks earlier — and figured it'd make for one of those good bar video games. (You know, the ones where you have to notice all the differences between the two pictures of the naked lady posting on a Victorian sofa or bear skin rug?)

Fashion Ump ruling: Seeing double, defer to first-base ump for decision

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Jimmy Rollins didn't impress anyone on the diamond during April, but courtside at a Sixers game was a different story altogether. I'm guessing that this green Phillies track jacket has to be custom made because it's a lot better than the one available to the Phightin' plebes.

Fashion Ump ruling: Green with envy; standup double

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Over the weekend, the Mariners and A's were the latest teams to go retro by donning the old Pacific Coast League uniforms of the Seattle Rainiers and Oakland Oaks. Both are great classic looks and worth repeating when the two teams match up in the future.

Fashion Ump ruling: 420-foot shot to center, home run

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You'd think that combining a Rayshawk with Gladiator might turn out better results ... but nope. Evan Longoria and Joe Maddon should have reserved their ire for these guys.

Fashion Ump ruling: Down on strikes!

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Yeah, his cap and shades might be a tad too big for his noggin', but kudos to Florida's Cameron Maybin for recognizing fashion's first rule: It's what you make of it.

Fashion Ump ruling: Bunt up the third base line, safe at first

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