In an argument between players with a combined age of 89 years, Jamie Moyer of the Rockies and Chipper Jones of the Braves snapped at each other Saturday night in Colorado. Jones, 40, later told reporters that Moyer, 49, accused him of stealing signs in the fifth inning as he led off second base before relaying them to Brian McCann in the batter's box. He also called Moyer "paranoid."
Jones added that the spat was a motivating factor for the Braves in their 13-9 comeback victory at Coors Field. Reporters could not get a comment about the incident from Moyer, but Chipper — who collected a hit in each of his next two at-bats and drove in five runs on the night — had some doozies via MLB.com.
"That was all on Jamie Moyer," Jones said. "He woke a sleeping giant tonight. He started chirping and it went all downhill from there. He accused me of relaying a sign down 6-2 with a 3-0 count to Brian McCann. I have never relayed a sign to anyone while I'm on second base."
Update: As reported by Mark Bowman of MLB.com on Twitter on Sunday, Chipper was still steaming at Moyer after the game:
Chipper said he told a couple Rockies he would discuss things w/ Moyer if he wanted to meet him in the hallway last night. — Mark Bowman (@mlbbowman) May 6, 2012
And there was more:
Chipper said he believes Moyer is paranoid because he formerly played for a team, the Phillies, who are known for stealing signs. — Mark Bowman (@mlbbowman) May 6, 2012
Not that the Braves would need to steal any signs on Moyer, Jones said via a tweet from Dave O'Brien of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:
More #Braves Chipper on Moyer "I mean, dude, we don't need signs, especially for him. I mean, my goodness, every pitch is 78. Come on."
So, when does "Saturday Night Live" ask Chipper to host? In his earlier diatribe, Jones implied some shady things about Moyer:
"You question our integrity, that's wrong," Jones said. "I've never accused him of doctoring a baseball. I've never accused him of over-milligraming, nothing. That's [garbage] and he woke us up. I didn't see any signs on the 900-foot homers that were hit."
"Doctoring a baseball" means throwing a scuffed or spitball. But "over-milligraming"? Does he mean Moyer has taken steroids? Viagra? Geritol? (Do old people still take Geritol?) Further — did Chipper just invent a term? Also, did he say to Moyer, "No, old man, I won't get off your lawn!"?
And in saying it's wrong to question another team's/person's integrity, is Jones implying that baseball players should just let each other cheat without calling the other guy on it in public? The first rule of Fight Club is, "Don't talk about Fight Club"? Not so, if he's accusing the Phillies. These unwritten rules are so layered.
Moyer finished with five earned runs and 10 hits allowed in five innings. He has a 4.01 ERA so far but a WHIP of 1.66 in six starts. If a reporter asks Moyer for his side of the spat Monday, hopefully he remembers. (That's an old-person joke.)
Regardless, as @FauxFrankWren reminds us all, this is what happens when you talk trash at Larry Wayne Jones.