Lames: Bears to punish Peterson. Really, Adrian, I went there.

Roto Arcade

Each week the Noise highlights 10 somewhat obscure, unobvious names who he believes are destined to torch the competition. For those playing the Lames home edition, each player must be started in at least 50 percent of Yahoo! leagues to qualify. As an accountability advocate, results, whether genius or moronic, will post the following week using the revamped scoring system shown here . If you're a member of TEAM HUEVOS, post your Week 6 Lames in the comments.

Matt Ryan, Atl, QB (Noise Week 6 QB Rank: 14, 61-percent started)
Matchup: vs. Car
Expectations for Ryan entering his fourth year were ridiculously high. Many believed the addition of Julio Jones to an already impressive stable of weapons would springboard his numbers to stratospheric heights. But averaging 19.7 points per game, the 14th-best output among QBs, he's failed to make that giant leap. What's to blame? Under more duress than last year (times sacked in '10: 23, '11: 14), he's wilted under the rising heat, evident in his completion percentage drop-off and spike in interceptions. Though the Panthers have allowed a league-high 8.7 yards per attempt, don't bank on Ryan suddenly doing an about face. Julio, handicapped by a strained hamstring, will be in street clothes. And with Chris Gamble, one of the league's finest cover corners according to Pro Football Focus, back in action, the paper friendly matchup is a bit deceiving. To alleviate pressure on Ryan and considering Carolina's problems against the run (5.3 ypc to RBs), Mike Smith will likely lean heavily on Michael Turner, a strategy the head coach has wanted to revert to for weeks. The Falcons' pass-run split currently stands at 56-44. Unless Cam Newton buries Atlanta early, don't expect the gunslinger to come out firing.
Fearless Forecast: 20-33, 254 passing yards, 1 touchdown, 1 interception, 15.7 fantasy points

Adrian Peterson, Min, RB (Noise Week 6 RB Rank: 16, 99-percent)
Matchup: at Chi
Mitt Romney is the most charismatic, relatable Republican candidate to come along in years. Generic cereals are just as good as original brands. And Radiohead hasn't turned weird, it's simply discovered its brilliantly imaginative side (Sidebar: I really miss The Bends days). To some, these are statements on par with calling the Purple Jesus a lame. Though he's notched two spectacular 25-point-plus efforts this year, not all has been roses for All-Day. Last year, he didn't post his first sub-10-point effort until Week 10. Already twice this year he's failed to reach double-digits (Clarification: In standard, non-fractional leagues). His Sunday night battle with the Bears could mark his third. In recent years, the Midway Monsters have had Peterson's number, holding the four-time Pro Bowler just under 3.5 yards per carry in their past three meetings. Yes, the Bears, still licking their wounds after giving up 163 yards on the ground to Jahvid Best Monday night, are vulnerable up front. Best, Turner and DeAngelo Williams each ripped off big runs against them. But Minnesota, unlike Chicago's previous opponents, has little to no passing game, meaning Brian Urlacher and company will focus their attention almost exclusively on stopping No. 28. The last time Peterson traveled to Chicago, he was held to a mere 75 total yards on 21 touches. In the rematch, another deflating effort could be in the offing. (UPDATE: Now that two starters on the Bears' defensive line are expected to miss Sunday night's game and with the safeties completely shuffled, my Peterson "Lame" designation is beyond insane. Due to the news, I've moved him up significantly in my ranks. However, since my prediction was written in stone Wednesday, I'll score it as though nothing changed.)
Fearless Forecast: 20 carries, 76 rushing yards, 3 receptions, 12 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 11.1 fantasy points

Jahvid Best, Det, RB (Noise Week 6 RB Rank: 27, 70-percent)
Matchup: vs. SF
Soaring peaks and depressing valleys best summarize Best's season thus far. The wildly inconsistent rusher has surpassed the 20-point mark and undercut the 10-point line twice in five games. In other words, he's the definition of "matchup-only" play. Coming off his finest rushing performance of his young career, the second-year standout should crash back to earth. San Francisco has deflected every back that's attempted to puncture its defensive line. Patrick Willis and friends have routinely snuffed out the run, shooting gaps aggressively and vigorously. The Niners have yet to allow a 70-yard rusher this season, holding starting RBs to just 2.8 yards per carry and 51.6 total yards per game. In a bye-heavy week, Best is still employable for PPR owners with shaky alternatives. But in standard formats, even highly competitive ones, he's barely flexy sexy. Avoid this Lion's den.
Fearless Forecast: 9 carries, 26 rushing yards, 4 receptions, 21 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 7.7 fantasy points

Pierre Garcon, Ind, WR (Noise Week 6 WR Rank: 33, 62-percent)
Matchup: at Cin
Is Painter-to-Garcon the new Manning-to-Harrison? Well, not exactly. Yes, Curtis Painter and Garcon have fostered bromantic feelings for one another over the past two weeks combining for four receptions (16 targets), 271 yards and four touchdowns, but those gaudy totals were achieved against Tampa Bay and Kansas City, two defenses that rank No. 20 and No. 17, respectively, against the pass. Versus Cincinnati, the league's third-stingiest pass D, Garcon will be force fed a strong dose of reality. Bengals corner Leon Hall has exhibited above average play thus far, but the true strength of Cincy's bracketing defense lies in its safeties. According to Pro Football Focus, Reggie Nelson and Chris Crocker rank well-inside the position's top-20 in pass coverage. That extra help over-the-top should come in handy containing the speedy Garcon downfield. Only two wideouts, Eric Decker and Jason Hill, have scored at least eight fantasy points against the Queen City Kitties this year. Garcon won't be the third.
Fearless Forecast: 3 receptions, 38 receiving yards, 6.1 fantasy points

Brandon Marshall, Mia, WR (Noise Week 6 WR Rank: 29, 53-percent)
Matchup: at NYJ
Revis Island is a lonely, barren place populated by palm trees, friendly volleyballs and empty fantasy performances. Expect Marshall to take-up a one-week residency. The offensive situation in Miami is becoming increasingly dire. All too familiar to 'Fins fans, drives have routinely bogged down under new offensive coordinator Brian Daboll. The Dolphins, thanks in part to Marshall's butter-fingers, rank 26th in red-zone efficiency. Establishing a consistent ground game would certainly help remedy those problems. With Matt Moore now under center and Daniel Thomas expected back in the lineup, that blueprint could unfold this week in New York, especially considering the inadequacies of the Jets' defensive line. If proven true, Marshall is destined for disappointment. Yes, the receiver's history versus NY is quite encouraging (17-237-2 in three games). However, top targets have performed neutrally against the Jets this year averaging 3.6 receptions and 61 yards per game. Unless Moore, who was outplayed by Jimmy "I couldn't hit the Atlantic Ocean from 10-yards away" Clausen last year in Carolina, suddenly morphs into Steve Beuerlein '99, Marshall will be marooned.
Fearless Forecast: 5 receptions, 46 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 8.4 fantasy points


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Image courtesy of US Presswire

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