Today, we're going to make you feel a little better about your fantasy team, no matter how galactically bad you think it is.
But I'm willing to guarantee that no matter what mistakes you made, you did not draft as poorly as the dude in the center of the image above. (Name withheld, because I don't remember it. But he was awesome, as was the league). His team is second from the right on the draft board, the one with Pittsburgh running back Rashard Mendenhall(notes) at the top and Tampa Bay wide receiver Arrelious Benn(notes) in the second round.
Yup, that's right: Arrelious Benn, rookie wideout — a man who's fourth on a bad team's depth chart — in the second round.
As you may have guessed, the guy in the photo above went with an all-Illini draft strategy. As you may have also guessed, Roto Arcade does not endorse such a strategy.
I attempted to offer assistance to the owner of Team Illini — he was among the Chicago attendees at the Thrillist/Yahoo! draft bonanza — but he refused to veer away from his theme. After taking running back Pierre Thomas(notes) in Round 3, he went with kicker (!) Neil Rackers(notes) in Round 4, then rookie Rams tight end Michael Hoomanawanui(notes) in Round 5.
And then he ran out of names, so we phoned Yahoo!'s resident Illini apologist, Brad Evans. That call yielded receivers Brandon Lloyd(notes), Greg Lewis(notes), and a pair of team defenses. And then he sketched in the roster with low-level Big Ten products. (Think Antwaan Randle El(notes), not Drew Brees(notes)).
In the end, the team was awful. Uniquely awful. Impressively awful. His running backs were solid, though. In a good week, he'll lose 85-45.
Please feel free to share the worst roster you've ever seen or drafted, commenters. If you can somehow under-perform the lineup above, you'll win the Ultimate Jeff George Gift Pack™, complete with inflatable doll, mullet, and self-adhesive goatee.
Photo via Dwayne Kuan/SpectacuLights