A teenager is causing a wide-spanning debate about responsibility after sharing her parents’ “unacceptable” babysitting request.
The 19-year-old, writing under the username rooceyroo, shared her dilemma in Reddit’s AITA (Am I The A******) forum. In the post, she described a recent argument with her dad and stepmom, which began when they found out they were having another baby.
“I’m a full-time [college] student. I’ve been living at home with them and leading up to their decision my dad was constantly asking if I was ok with having a sibling,” the Redditor wrote. “[To be honest] I didn’t feel it was my place to even say anything.”
But that feeling changed when the teen’s dad began discussing the help he’d need once the baby was born.
‘I thought this was a joke’
The Redditor explained in her post that, despite living at home, she has several expenses she handles herself — from student loans to transportation — and works a part-time job while taking classes. But as the baby’s due date approached, her father started asking her to give up those commitments.
“One day we had a conversation about the baby being a handful and he said, ‘Well since you don’t have to pay board and only work 3 days a week you can just quit your job and babysit so we can have a break,'” the teen wrote. “Of course I thought this was a joke.”
She went on to explain that her dad got mad at that response, explaining that the child was also her responsibility because “this is how family works.” She added that her dad even suggested she start skipping class in order to occasionally help out with the baby.
“Ever since [the argument] he’s been saying stuff like, ‘This is what being an adult is about. You look after family. Don’t you love your brother?'” the teen added.
‘I have to drop everything’
The teen wrote that she still believes it’s her parents’ responsibility to look after the child, as it was their decision to have him.
“I’ve honestly gotten really sick of the expectation that since they’re having a kid I have to drop everything for it so ‘they can have a break,'” she wrote.
She went on to say that she’s continued to “put her foot down” over the issue, but is now feeling guilty — thanks in part to other family members saying she’s being inconsiderate.
“I’m wondering if I am being selfish,” she asked her fellow Redditors.
‘Stand your ground’
Many users in the forum seemed widely supportive of the teenager, telling her she was in the right and even suggesting she move out of the house.
“Asking you to help out a bit is one thing, but suggesting you quit your job or skip out on uni? Totally unacceptable. Is it at all possible for you to move out?” one commenter wrote.
“You are absolutely not overreacting! Stand your ground. They chose to have this child. Same way your parents chose to have you. You don’t owe them anything because they raised you/married your dad,” another added.
Some suggested other solutions. One user wrote that the teen should consider speaking with her stepmom about the problem, instead of continuing to argue with her dad.
“Have you talked to your stepmom? Does she know your dad basically expects you to raise their kid for them? A lot of first time moms would be appalled at having someone else play mommy to their first child,” the commenter wrote.
If you liked this story, check out In The Know’s article on one Redditor’s controversial tattoo idea.
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