Please, I Am Begging You, Do Not Wear Anything Even CLOSE To These 16 Halloween Costumes

·3 min read

After the long, eventful 2021 we've had, you *might* be thinking, hey, it would be super funny to go as something from the last year or so!

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And if you'er talking about, say, Black Widow or Beth from Queen's Gambit, sure! But...if you're thinking of going as any of the below, please, I am BEGGING you, reconsider.


1.Like...PLEASE do not go as a Capitol insurrectionist.

Capitol insurrectionist with American flag and a fur and horns hat

I can't even believe that was this year, but it was.

Win McNamee / Getty Images

2.Honestly, don't go as the police, either.

sexy sleeveless policeman costume

Or God forbid, riot police.

3.If you think it'd be funny to dress as Donald Trump, the joke's on you.

Donald Trump costume

We don't want to see him this year.

4.Ditto goes for Mike Pence, even with the fly on his head.

Mike pence with a fly on his head

This was funny for a quick photo last year, but not this year. Listen, we don't want to see Mike Pence. We don't want to think about him. We don't even want to think of the fly that did God's work that night.

ERIC BARADAT/AFP via Getty Images

5.I want to think we as a people are better than dressing as COVID, but the costume exists, so I believe I may have once again thought too highly of the human race.

man in COVID virus costume

It's happened a lot this year.

6.Let's not go as the vaccine either, OK?

woman in vaccine costume

At least the vaccine is a good thing, but going as it sort of suggests it's scary, and...well, let's not spread misinformation.

7.Look, I get the urge to go as an anti-vaxxer, I really do. They are scary. But maybe don't joke about things that have caused death.

woman in anti-vaxxer costume with a bathrobe and signs saying "I heard vaccines cause autism" and other anti-vaxxer sentiments
u/Angieelaaa / Reddit / Via

8.And ESPECIALLY don't go as an anti-vaxxer with a dead child. I don't think I should have to say this.

woman dressed as a "karen" and her non-vaccinated child (a skeleton)

Love the general "get vaccinated" statement, hate the venue for it. As a rule, it's best not to make jokes about dead children.

Autumn Dayss / Facebook / Via

9.I know it's tempting to make fun of people taking Ivermectin, but...let's leave the horse drug and its shitty side effects out of Halloween this year, fellas.

woman in anti-vaxxer/ivermectin costume with inflatable toilet and legs that show she's pooping

10.Hand sanitizer may seem like an innocent costume, but I feel like it's best to stay away from anything that'll make people think of COVID.

man in hand sanitizer costume

11.Don't be a Karen. Not even for Halloween.

12.Let's leave nurses alone this year, OK?

woman in sexy nurse costume

Show some respect.

13.If you go as sexy Ruth Bader Ginsburg...even I can't help you.

Dayna Kathan dressed as a sexy Ruth

This isn't the way to honor her.

dadadayns / Instagram / Via Instagram: @

14.Honestly, it's not a bad idea to avoid Harry Potter-themed costumes this year.

woman in Harry Potter costume

And I CERTAINLY don't want to see anyone going as JKR.

15.I'm cool with Squid Game costumes, but going as a sexy Squid Game guard just feels wrong.

sexy neon squid game zip up costume

Squid Game feels a little too topical...going as a sexy version of guards who murder desperate indebted citizens as part of a game feels slightly in poor taste.

16.And finally, please, for the love of God, stay away from anything to do with Armie Hammer.

I don't want to see any cannibal-themed Armie costumes this year. I don't think I need to say anything beyond that.

I don't want to see any cannibal-themed Armie costumes this year. I don't think I need to say anything beyond that.

Todd Williamson/E! Entertainment / NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images

What costumes are you, like me, fearful to see your problematic Uncle Frank or your boyfriend's annoying friend dress up as this year? Let us know in the comments!