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Ten Ways You Know You’re a Soccer Mom
Just because your child plays soccer doesn't mean you are a soccer mom. Here are ten ways you know you're a soccer mom. How many of these do you fit?
10. You often find mud patties on the floor that look like cleat marks. They are perfectly molded to the studs on the bottom of their soccer cleats.
9. There is a pile of soccer equipment somewhere in your house. This can be a pile of soccer bags, cleats, shin guards or balls. Sometimes all of these items form one massive pile that only seems to get larger.
8. You drive a minivan or sport utility vehicle to games and practices. Your trunk has two or more camping chairs and a few soccer blankets.
7. Every load of laundry has a soccer item in it. This includes soccer jerseys, shorts and shin guards. And if it's a tournament weekend, it means an extra load on Saturday night.
6. You have more than one child playing soccer. One child playing soccer is easy. Two is where it gets interesting, especially when they have games scheduled at the same time. Your rank as soccer mom increases with each additional child playing soccer.
5. There is an inordinate amount of water bottles in your kitchen. They vary in size, color and material. Some containers even have soccer logos on them. You have a bottle brush by your sink.
4. Your weekly calendar has the word "soccer" on at least three out of the seven days. You often change or decline plans because you have soccer. There is no vacation during soccer season.
3. You have used "no soccer" as a punishment. Since your child loves soccer, this is the easiest way to get them to do what you want. Corollary: If your child hates soccer, then you argue with them about why they should go to practice.
2. Your husband is the coach or assistant coach. You often pick up the slack at home while he is at a game or practice.
1. You are the coach. Congratulations! You are the queen of soccer moms! Coaching your child's team and dealing with all these peripheral activities is a huge responsibility. Kudos goes to the team parents and treasurers too.
More from Edwin Torres:
Edwin Torres has been coaching competitive youth soccer since 2001. He enjoys coaching, playing and watching the game of soccer. For more articles, follow him on Twitter @FlipPoker.
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