Thu Jul 21 02:01am EDT
Paraguay are now in the Copa America final for the first time since they last won in 1979. Three of their five matches have ended 0-0 and they haven't won a single game outside of a penalty shootout. So it's really quite fitting that they reached the final with a 0-0 match against Venezuela that they won 5-3 on penalties. Even if it is also incredibly boring. Which it was.
Perhaps to remind themselves that they were all still alive, the two sides engaged in an ugly brawl after the match. It was the kind of thing you never want to see, but after a game like that it was kind of nice just to see something.
So now the 2011 Copa America final is set and it is a battle of the -guays -- Uruguay v Paraguay. The winners will not only be champions of South America, they will also get to rename their country "Totalguay." The losers will be forced to name themselves the first word out of Larissa Riquelme's mouth that isn't "Paraguay" or "naked."