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Tue Sep 02 10:37am EDT

Curtis Sanford's new goalie mask might frighten small children

By Greg Wyshynski

The Vancouver Canucks have mined the creative bankruptcy of their "Design Curtis Sanford's goalie mask" entries and created a Top 10 entries gallery; one of which, we assume, will be the mask the Canucks' backup goalie wears this season, replacing the "Christopher Lee meets and angry owl" one right from last year (pictured right).

(There's also an "editors' choice" Top 40 list; we didn't search through it to find out if that one with the eagle holding the penis and the lumberjack fellating a brown bear made the cut. We're assuming it did not, considering it was also made with crayons.)

Looking at the finalists, the decision is clear: Sanford's either going to have some silly combination of Canucks' logos, colors and the nickname "Sandman"; or his mask is going to be scarier than the Tobe Hooper sections of "Poltergeist." Seriously, go to the gallery and click either three times, seven times or nine times; the first two masks look like you're staring into the jaws of a Steve Zissou sea monster, and the last mask looks like something that ate the crew of the Nostromo.

So in the end, Sanford's mask will, most likely, be rather conservative in its design. No Marvel Comics copyright infringement or maudlin tributes to fallen teammates or super-creepy wizards, like the one featured here from Waiting for Stanley. Kudos to the Canucks for a great contest, even if the winner will only be seen, what, nine times at most this season?

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