Now, you can profit from Pacman's presence in Dallas the old-fashioned way: by gambling on his inability to behave himself.

You can make the following bets at BodogLife.com, and I'd like to suggest that the gentleman responsible for coming up with such wagers get a sizable bonus.

I love how they threw Terrell Owens in there for no apparent reason. To my knowledge, Terrell Owens has never been in any strip club trouble (his tastes are a little more hardcore). To his credit, he seems to limit his off-the-field controversies to fake suicide attempts and implying that various quarterbacks are gay (he probably loved Law & Order last night).

The bet I like most here is that yes, Pacman will be reinstated by training camp. Two reasons: 1) I don't think the story about extortion payments has any effect on Pacman being reinstated, as he's already been suspended for over a year for his role in that shooting. That particular bit of news doesn't involve him in anything new. And 2) Jerry Jones is probably pretty confident that Pac will be available for training camp, or he wouldn't have traded for him, and I'm sure Jones is privy to more information on this than any of us.

Related: NFL Criminal Behavior