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Shutdown Corner

Wed Jan 20 12:38pm EST

Rex Ryan maintains his girlish figure with 7,000 calories a day

By MJD

According to the New York Post, Rex Ryan, the brilliant head coach of the New York Jets, consumes 7,000 calories a day. There are several African nations with entire populations that don't consume 7,000 calories a day. He's tried cutting down, but it's not a lifestyle that suits him. From the Post:

The big fella has gone on several weight-loss programs to raise money for his children's teams, but admits the pounds always return.

"There's not too many fat guys that are coaches," he said in 2007. "But I don't see how your weight can make you a better coach."

To put that 7,000 calories into perspective, here's one possible daily diet that would reach 7,000 calories a day. All nutritional information comes from the McDonalds website.

Breakfast:
3 Egg McMuffins (900 calories)
2 Sausage Burritos (600 calories)
4 Hash Browns (600 calories)

Lunch:
Quarter Pounder w/Cheese (510 calories)
McRib (500 calories)
Large Fries (500 calories)
2 Hot Apple Pies (500 calories)

Dinner:
2 Big Macs (1080 calories)
2 Filet-O-Fish Sandwiches (760 Calories)
10 piece Chicken McNuggets (460 calories)
Large Fries (500 calories)
Chocolate Chip Cookie (160 calories)

So yeah, that's quite a bit. In fact, in a vote on the Huffington Post website, more than a third of people voting don't even believe that a 7,000 calorie-a-day diet is even possible.

I don't know. I'm not a nutritionist (this may not shock you), but metabolism can be a funny thing. Some people are just born to burn calories all day long, and clearly, Rex Ryan, despite the weight, is a high-energy guy. He's always had a high-stress job. My guess is that he's an eat-a-lot, burn-a-lot type of fellow.

Whatever the case, he's obviously a gifted football coach, and as long as he's winning, I'm sure Jets fans won't care if he relaxes each night in bed with an economy-size tub of Crisco and a spoon.

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