Oh, Pacman Jones. You irrepressible little scamp. No matter what grand opportunities keep falling in your lap, you have the uncanny ability to mangle them beyond recognition. In this, you are the best in the world at what you do.

It had become clear that Pacman Jones wasn't going to get a call from an NFL team before the start of the season. Tough break for Pacman there. Silver lining, though? The Winnipeg Blue Bombers of the Canadian League were interested, and if Pacman went up there, played well and kept his nose clean, that might be his ticket back to the big league.

Was Pacman able to keep himself in line? Not even for long enough to get to Winnipeg.

Pacman did a live show on UStream last night, a website that allows users to stream live video of themselves, or of anything, really, to anyone in the world who wants to watch. Unfortunately for Pacman, the Winnipeg Blue Bombers were watching. From Paul Friesen at the Winnipeg Sun:

"Go to the UFL and do my thing and get ready for a playoff run in the NFL, you know what I'm sayin'?"

That's when someone called Jones, live, and presumably told him what league he was really going to.

Gotta love that commitment, Pac.

Throughout, fans chatted with the guy, some from Winnipeg. One told him it was cold here.

"Pain is only temporary," Jones said. "Besides, I'm only gonna be there for eight weeks... or shorter."

I love this little tidbit, too:

For 44 minutes, Jones came across as a complete imbecile, bragging about his luxurious home and getting his girlfriend to show off her engagement ring: "Y'all know what 41/2 karats look like in one stone? Paid for!"

So, to recap, Pacman Jones didn't even know the name of the league in which he thought he'd be playing. He disparaged that league by equating playing there to "pain," and indicated a desire to get back to the NFL as soon as possible (which might be true, but it still disrespectful to the Canadian league, and something you probably don't want to mention out loud).

And then, just for good measure, he bragged about his money and made everyone wonder, "Who in the world would agree to marry Pacman Jones?"

Anyway, so much for Winnipeg. They saw Pacman's performance, and they didn't care for it, so their interest in Pacman Jones is dead. Maybe the UFL, the league he thought showed an interest, could still give him a call. If not, there's always the professional wrestling. That might be the one bridge that Pacman hasn't torched yet.

Gracias, Pro Football Talk.

Related: NFL Criminal Behavior, United Football League