Shutdown Corner - NFL

Shutdown Corner

Fri Feb 01, 2008 5:17 am EST

If I suddenly stop posting, here's why ...

By MJD



I saw that sign in the hotel lobby last night, and I'm currently busy telling myself that there's nothing to worry about, because, you know ... it's perfectly safe to be around Ray Lewis during Super Bowl week.

Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled to be here and everything, but ... not only would Yahoo! not spring to put me up in accommodations better suited to a man of my particular deviancies, but I'm also apparently sleeping in the vicinity of Ray Lewis. During Super Bowl week. I'd say that puts the chances of me being stabbed this week at about 30 to 40 percent. And until they replace the metal butter-knives with plastic ones, I'm staying away from the continental breakfast, too.

Thanks a lot, guys. If we do this Super Bowl thing again in the future, maybe you can find a place for me to stay where I share a room with a white woman that OJ Simpson used to date.

Related: Super Bowl XLII Adventures

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13 Comments

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  1. zibby
    1. Posted by zibby Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:48 pm EDT

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    Awesome. Hilarious.
    I think about a dozen Yahoo! lusers' heads just exploded reading that.
  2. NFL LOST RESPECT
    2. Posted by NFL LOST RESPECT Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:50 pm EDT

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    I am not a Giants fan but The New York TImes has posted an article concerning the destruction of evidence about New England cheating. Fans are losing confidence in the NFL knowing a super bowl team was caught cheating. No matter what the NFL does to get rid of this stain upon itself, it will always be there until it reveals the truth about the New England Patriots cheating to win games. The 2007 New England players will always be looked upon as benefiting from their coach's cheating ! Now the NFL is a secret organization like the CIA. I will continue to boycott the NFL by refusing to watch their games until the NFL cleans up its act.
  3. Patrick B
    3. Posted by Patrick B Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:08 pm EDT

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    #2, you're an idiot. If you look back upon the illustrious history of the NFL, you'll see salary cap infringement, steroid abuse, signal stealing (since before the Pats), contract tampering, unsafe medical practices, criminal charges, and a slew of other illegal, immoral, and tainted activites. If you really think that what the Pats did is the straw to break the camel's back, then you're either naive or ignorant. The NFL isn't a high class society who've held themselves up to a moral standard. They're a hard nose, win at all costs, make money business. You keep boycotting the games. I'm sure the NFL doesn't really worry about losing one halfass fan. The rating this year have been higher than ever, so someone is watching.
  4. shufflin_danks
    4. Posted by shufflin_danks Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:21 pm EDT

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    Wahhh wahhhh, my ream didn;t make the super bowl so I'm gonna cry like a girl. Hey pal, the the Pats got caught 2 mintues into the season cheating. A lot they did with that info. And it wasn't a rule before then so deal with it.
  5. Brave Sir Robin
    5. Posted by Brave Sir Robin Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:39 pm EDT

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    I think we're missing the bigger picture. We really need to pray for MJD (or just say "Good Luck" if you don't like praying). God knows he needs our protection from God's Linebacker.
    On second though, maybe we shouldn't pray. Every time you pray, Ray Lewis gets stronger.
  6. sam spade
    6. Posted by sam spade Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:12 pm EDT

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    And Michael Vick is in jail for killing dogs!?
  7. jlarugger
    7. Posted by jlarugger Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:36 pm EDT

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    Aren't chris henry and pacman the only two massueses that you can hire at rae carruth's spa??
  8. jlarugger
    8. Posted by jlarugger Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:36 pm EDT

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    Aren't chris henry and pacman the only two massueses that you can hire at rae carruth's spa??
  9. bizzo5000
    9. Posted by bizzo5000 Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:08 pm EDT

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    And when you're done they've hired Leonard Little's Limo Service to drive you home.
  10. dirtydog
    10. Posted by dirtydog Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:43 pm EDT

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    I think you guys get your laughs on the dumbest things. Ray Lewis is only a threat on the football field and even that is losing it's effect. He was punked by joey porter and is considered a wanna be. You can't compare him to the other deffects you make fun of. You would go home more healthy sharing a room with Ray then Paris Hilton.
  11. dirtydog
    11. Posted by dirtydog Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:43 pm EDT

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    i think you guys get your laughs on the dumbest things. ray lewis is only a threat on the football field and even that is losing it
  12. dirtydog
    12. Posted by dirtydog Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:43 pm EDT

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    i think you guys get your laughs on the dumbest things. ray lewis is only a threat on the football field and even that is losing it
  13. bizzo5000
    13. Posted by bizzo5000 Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:08 pm EDT

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    Paris Hilton doesn't like to get stabby.

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