The conduct of the Redskins' center isn't only detrimental to the team, but it's conduct detrimental to society as a whole, and certainly an affront to anyone who places even a little bit of value on hygiene.

Chris Cooley, the greatest athlete blogger the world has ever known (I'm looking at you, Gilbert) interviewed Jason Campbell for his blog, and they got inside the evil mind and buttocks (figuratively for Cooley, literally for Campbell) of center Casey Rabach.

3. Jason, have you ever smelled the back of your left hand (the one that's securely lodged under the center's sweaty butt crack the entire game) after a game? I would imagine that hand would have to go through a thorough decontamination process after every game and practice. 

For everyone to know if you don’t take a bath your butt crack stinks and I think that's what Rabach does to me. Imagine sweating for 2 hours and you're Casey Rabach and you're really hairy and stinky. Rabach has even farted on my hand which is a feelin that never really wears off. I can actually feel it while we’re doing this interview right now. After each practice and game the first thing I do is wash my hands of all that chaotic stuff running off his sweaty, nasty body.

Why do that to your own quarterback, man? I realize that there's not much you can do to make it a pleasant area, but you don't have to go out of your way to make it unpleasant. No one's asking you to stuff an Airwick down the back of your pants, but at least give the undercarriage a bit of a how's your father before gametime.

Those are unsafe working conditions. I, for one, am not going to act surprised when in week three, Jason Campbell becomes the first quarterback to take snaps wearing rubber gloves and a surgical mask. Shape up, Rabach. It's time to take Laurence Maroney's advice (naughty language alert).

Related: NFL Criminal Behavior, NFL Oddness