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This 1988 Philadelphia Eagles rap video, 'Buddy's Watchin You,' is pure gold

We were treated to some fantastic stories following the death of James “Buddy” Ryan, one of the best defensive coaches of his era and a throwback to another time. It’s safe to say that even in a league with two of his bombastic sons coaching, there will never be another Buddy.

And we hope there will be no other “Buddy’s Watchin’ You” either.

The era of teams making rap videos, from the “Super Bowl Shuffle” to the lost classic, “Let’s Ram It!” is a bygone one. Some things are best left in the past.

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But that doesn’t mean we can’t revisit them from time to time and ask, rhetorically, “What in the actual heck was happening here?”

Such is the case with the 1988 Philadelphia Eagles paean to Buddy Ryan, their head coach, a video that was unearthed through the magic of social media after Ryan’s death on Tuesday.

First, of all, the title: Kind of creepy, no? Very “Every Breath You Take”-ish, although I doubt Buddy was much of a Sting fan, especially in that “Dream Of The Blue Turtles” era. And yeah, Buddy might have been watching, but he sure wasn’t going to be caught dead participating. In fact, the only authority figure we see in the video — other than Rev. Reggie White, that is — is the unknown producer guy nodding along at the board at the musical magic he heard outpouring from the monitors.

Unknown Producer Guy (youtube.com screenshot)
Unknown Producer Guy (youtube.com screenshot)

On some level, Ryan likely loved the bravado of the “Super Bowl Shuffle” and perhaps even this Eagles knockoff in his third season as the Eagles head coach, when things were finally starting to come together. But what would his reaction have been when he did watch?

We can only imagine him trying to make it through the Luis Zendejas portion without laughing. Yes, Buddy was stoic; it’s the military background in him. But any man able to keep a straight face during this portion of the video (which begins at the 1:01 mark) needs to be tested immediately for toxic levels of lithium.

I’m Luis Zendejas, I kick field goals
Am I nervous? Yes, but
I win the game by hitting the mark
And this game’s over before it starts

To try and picture his Eagles teammates first introducing themselves to Zendejas (the second-year kicker started the year on the Cowboys’ roster) and then explaining to him that he’d be featured in a rap video named “Buddy’s Watchin’ You” with prominent verse placement — and that, oh, yes, he’d need to write some slick rhymes for said part — is impossibly comical. Do you think Zendejas assumed he was being punked? These are the mysteries that might go unsolved.

Rappin' Reggie White (youtube.com screenshot)
Rappin’ Reggie White (youtube.com screenshot)

Another note: Where was Cris Carter? Even Eric Allen sat this one out. We get White and Randall Cunningham, the two biggest stars on the team, and the best musical contributions are offered by the dulcet, Tone Lōc-like tones of tight end Keith Jackson. He had a future here, and it’s sad we haven’t seen more of his work since.

And did you realize that Wade Phillips and Jeff Fisher were assistants under Buddy on this team? Where were they? Especially Wade, everyone’s darling now. Had I known about all this a week ago when I talked to Fisher about the time Bill Cowher broke his leg, I most certainly would have scrapped those plans and shifted my efforts toward “Buddy’s Watchin’ You: The Oral History” instead.

This video in no way sums up Buddy Ryan, of course. His legacy was defense and an ornery style that feels like it was also from a time machine. As great as he was, we’re not sure how well that would have flown these days. You could say that Ryan, like NFL team rap videos, worked best in the era in which they came along. Now, maybe not so much.

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Eric Edholm is a writer for Shutdown Corner on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at edholm@yahoo-inc.com or follow him on Twitter!