COMMENTARY | Are you a fan of the Atlanta Braves, fantasy baseball and semi-obvious puns? If so, you have come to the right place.
The 2013 fantasy baseball season is here, which means owners will be on the prowl for the perfect fantasy baseball team name to call their virtual squads. Thanks to the collective group of characters on the Atlanta Braves, fans will have no shortage of options from which to choose in 2013.
That's Just Beachy
Despite losing Brandon Beachy to Tommy John surgery last season, the Atlanta Braves are hoping everything will be all "Beachy" until he returns in June. If the Braves can solider on without him for the first half of the year, his return could be on par with adding a high-priced free agent at the trade deadline.
Up, Up and a-Hey
Many assume the Los Angeles Angels' outfield of Mike Trout, Josh Hamilton and Mark Trumbo will be the best in baseball. However, the Atlanta Braves' trio of Justin Upton, B.J. Upton and Jason Heyward may have something to say about that -- they already have the cooler nickname.
Yes We McCann!
After getting bounced from the playoffs by the St. Louis Cardinals in the inaugural wild-card game in 2012, the Atlanta Braves will be repeating this mantra all year long -- particularly if their six-time All-Star catcher "McCann" returns to form after offseason shoulder surgery. Brian McCann will look to bounce back after hitting a career-low .230 in 2012.
Super Upton Brothers
The Atlanta Braves are eagerly waiting to see if the acquisitions of Justin Upton and B.J. Upton will bring them the same success those plunger-wielding brothers found in the video-game world. Not sure yet on which of the Upton brothers will be Mario and which one will have to settle for being Luigi.
Freddie Got Freeman'd
If you want to show off your devotion to the Atlanta Braves, as well as your knowledge of obscure Tom Green comedies, this is the perfect name for your fantasy team. After belting 23 homers and driving in 94 runs last season, Freddie Freeman will be one of the players anchoring the middle of the Atlanta batting order in 2013.
The Good, the Bad and the Uggla
Unfortunately, for Atlanta fans, this name might hit too close to home. Dan Uggla had a year to forget in 2012 when he batted just .220. The Good: Uggla has averaged 30 home runs per season over his seven-year career. The Bad: The 12 errors Uggla committed was the third highest total among NL second baseman last season. The Uggla: The Braves' diminutive power hitter has averaged 162 strikeouts per season during his two years with Atlanta.
The J-Hey Kids
Willie Mays may have been the "Say Hey Kid," but the Atlanta Braves have the "J-Hey Kid." Jason Heyward got hit with the proverbial "sophomore slump" in 2011, but he returned to form in 2012 when he hit 27 home runs and 82 RBIs. Since Chipper Jones is now fishing full-time, the Braves are officially Heyward's team.
The Wood Chippers
He may be retired, but No. 10 jerseys will always litter the Turner Field crowd. Given his 468 career home runs, it's safe to say Chipper Jones may have chipped a few bats during his 19 seasons.
Carry on my Heyward Son
Combine a classic Kansas song with the Braves' right fielder and you get a fantasy team name that may almost guarantee you a spot in the championship. Although, since Jason Heyward signed a 1-year, $3.65 million contract earlier this year, the Braves will need to lock him up to a long-term contract in the future if they don't want to risk him "carrying on" to another club.
Teheran up My Heart
With Brandon Beachy in on the shelf for a while, rookie Julio Teheran will play a vital role in the Atlanta Braves' rotation. Teheran has been turning heads this spring as the rookie right-hander has recorded a 1.04 ERA in 26 innings of work. Hopefully his success won't fizzle out the way NSYNC's did in the late-90s.
Anthony Schreiber is a freelance sportswriter based in "Braves Country." He has penned articles for a variety of online publications and magazines.
- Sports & Recreation
- Atlanta Braves
- Justin Upton
- Jason Heyward
- Brandon Beachy