We like to think of ourselves around here as connoisseurs of the subtle art of the head coach impersonation, as practiced by current and former players alike. And as the genre goes, it must be said that last week's offering of USC players attempting to imitate the indecipherable Cajun growl of ManBearCoach Ed Orgeron fell well short of expectations. Any clip in which the coach's actual voice is ten times as cartoonish as any of the players' impressions is an automatic pan, especially when one of the key impressionists is forced to admit "I can't get that loud, it hurts my throat." Aw.
The sad truth is that the Trojans held back that last little bit of dignity and/or shame that makes or breaks a performance – very much unlike senior Alabama walk-on Rob Ezell, who deserves a scholarship solely for the gusto of his Nick Saban impression for ESPN's "All-Access" cameras:
Ezell probably won't do anything on the field this fall except hold for extra points and field goals, if that. But for giving Tide fans ample grounds for claiming their first Coach Impersonating National Championship, he'll go down in 'Bama lore forever. Daniel Moore is standing by.
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Matt Hinton is on Twitter: Follow him @DrSaturday.