August 23, 2010
You know how it is: You're 19. It's summer. It's Saturday night; at some point, it's technically Sunday morning. You're out with your friends. You're having a good time. You're not hurting anybody. You're not about that at all. You're just ... OK, now you're stripping naked. You're wandering into a strange house. You're taking all 300 unadorned, pasty pounds up the stairs. When the cops show up, yeah, you're trying to bum-rush them from a three-point stance. Aaaaand here come the Tasers.
On second thought, maybe you don't know how it is. After this weekend, though, Oregon State offensive lineman Tyler Thomas knows all too well:
According to information from the Corvallis Police Department, at about 4:51 a.m., police were called to 519 N.W. 14th Street after a 32-year-old woman reported there was a naked man in the upstairs office of her residence.
When officers arrived, they ordered him to get on the ground several times, but he refused. Then Thomas, who had reportedly been drinking, got into a "three-point stance" and lunged at the officers, who Tased him.
Thomas was booked into Benton County Jail but was released later the same day.
Thomas was charged with second-degree criminal mischief, first-degree criminal trespass and resisting arrest. He also received a swift boot from OSU coach Mike Riley, who noted that Thomas' impromptu "Oklahoma" drill in the buff was "not his first go-around with this," after separate incidents involving underage drinking and a fake ID in the spring: "The move was not a one-time thing. It was a number of reasons. This was icing on the cake." That would be a delicious explanation, if I still had an appetite.