Ball Don't Lie - NBA

(Ed. Note: This is part two of Rod's week in Vegas at Summer League. Click here to read part one.)

I ended up having to sit out the first two games of the Summer League. I expected it so I guess I didn’t feel too weird about sitting on the sidelines while some members of The Movement sat behind me and cheered on the Raptors. I tried to warm up for the second game, but nine minutes of warm-up (all that they have time for) is not nearly enough for my knee to go from "not functional" to "completely mobile." I focused my attention on a scrimmage we were supposed to have on Tuesday of last week. I figured I'd have enough time to get loose and give it a go. Plus we had a day off the next day so it would be a perfect opportunity to gauge my injury.

I learned two things that Tuesday: that it was extremely painful and awkward to warm-up, and that it was even tougher to stay warm. My play ranged from decent, to mediocre, to just plain bad at times. I had no athleticism. Sure I could run, but not fast. I could jump, but not touch the rim. I felt like it was obvious to everyone there what was going on. 30 minutes of warm-up proved to be just enough for me to get to 70% effectiveness. A guy like me needs all 100 of his percentage points.

We now had a couple days before the next contest, so everyone was out in the lobby, bars, and clubs at the Palms. Palms is definitely the hotel of choice for young people. There were lovely ladies all around and many ballers trying to stake their claim. My boy JGant and I went up to the Ghostbar because it was low key and in the same tower as my hotel room. If I got tired, I could easily catch the elevator down to my room and go to bed.

When we got in, this guy at the bar asked me if I had three quarters with me. I told him that I did. He then took his Corona bottle, laid a dollar bill on the top, and placed the quarters on top of the dollar bill, securing it in place. JGant and I had no idea what this was all about. He then asked a girl nearby to try to remove the dollar from its spot, without moving the bottle or the quarters, all while using only one finger. Clearly we all looked at him like he was crazy. After she failed many times, and I failed many times, he whisked his finger past the bill knocking it out and leaving the quarters in their place. It became evident that this was a master pick-up line and that he was good at what he did. All the women in the vicinity were now trying to knock the dollar off of his bottle.

The next day, JGant and I practiced this over and over until we got it exactly right. Then we spent my day off by the pool, asking girls if they could do it. I found a way to entertain the ladies that day without ever having to score a bucket. All it cost me was $1.75.

Although I would gladly have paid anything to be healthy for the next day's game, only time would tell that tale. I still wasn't sure how I would fare with only nine minutes to warm-up. If only quarter tricks got you women and NBA contracts.

Rod Benson is a Cal grad who played for the D-League's Dakota Wizards. When he's not busy channeling  David Blaine, he blogs one or two times a week on Ball Don't Lie. Read his archive, pay a visit to TooMuchRodBenson.com and always support the Boom Tho movement.

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30 Comments

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  1. Jason
    1. Posted by Jason Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:06 pm EDT

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    this post is a bit weaksauce
  2. VitasM
    2. Posted by VitasM Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:57 pm EDT

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    man, your blog is slippin
  3. L.
    3. Posted by L. Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:33 pm EDT

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    It's time to retire, Rod.
    Quit while you're still ahead.
  4. jo b
    4. Posted by jo b Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:41 pm EDT

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    we dont have dollar bills in canada
  5. Des T
    5. Posted by Des T Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:33 pm EDT

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    get some physio on your knee Rod. that'll sort ya
  6. Jason
    6. Posted by Jason Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:06 pm EDT

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    I mean, the writing is still up to par, this has all the right flavor, but it seems a bit too scaled back in content.
  7. riggs
    7. Posted by riggs Thu Sep 03, 2009 8:40 pm EDT

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    Thats cause dude is hurt. come on guys common sense is only a step away.
  8. UK
    8. Posted by UK Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:27 pm EDT

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    Daaang. Cut the man some slack...this is probably the biggest moment in his career (plus he's in Vegas!). This ain't Bismark, kids.
  9. Anthony
    9. Posted by Anthony Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:36 pm EDT

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    I don't know what the hell you guys are all talking about. TMRB is still a great read, especially now that he's trying out for an NBA roster. Even if you feel the quality is slipping a bit, it's still better than any of the other crap blogs out there.
  10. kevin k
    10. Posted by kevin k Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:08 pm EDT

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    Dawg you need to come to A-TOWN and let them scrubass management sign you up. We only have like 8 or 9 players signed and we could use a quality big man who get them boards NAH MEAN? we only have holford and ZAZAZA and solomon who?
  11. the antoine
    11. Posted by the antoine Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:44 pm EDT

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    with this trick youll not only be in there like swimwear.. but no doubt BOOM GOT THEM DOS!.. 60% of the time.. it works everytime
  12. Andy J
    12. Posted by Andy J Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:43 pm EDT

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    boom
    outta here
  13. SAM S
    13. Posted by SAM S Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:26 pm EDT

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    rod ur in there like swimwear
  14. donnymassenburg
    14. Posted by donnymassenburg Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:46 pm EDT

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    Too much. Boom!
  15. jonathan s
    15. Posted by jonathan s Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:37 pm EDT

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    I checked the summer league blog on nba.com, apparently hecklers show up even when the games don't count. It's too bad you were hurt, it would have been better to see how you did healthy and as a starter. I'm going to try that bottle trick this weekend though.
  16. LAKERSSSS
    16. Posted by LAKERSSSS Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:10 pm EDT

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    that is a ballin trick-
  17. Lukasz K
    17. Posted by Lukasz K Thu Sep 03, 2009 8:16 pm EDT

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    hes concentrating on the pro league and working to get a contract, im sure he has not alot of time to be writing blogs right now. im sure when everything is in the clear he'll be back strong.
  18. jimm120
    18. Posted by jimm120 Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:35 pm EDT

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    The posts don't feel meaty...but there is a reason to that: He is purposefully leaving out content that we KNOW he has (since he played in the summer league), but he is leaving the posts without answering or talking about certain things about his games/others. Though, with all honesty, I'm sure he can't say some things (very personal and hurtful to him) or its too specific about certain coaching/strategic options that teams have.
    I like that he's been a bit more in-depth about the NBA summer league (as in, what activities...something he lacked during the season about the nbaDL). But in the end, he's leaving info out and it seems most people are picking up no that.
    Still, hopefully he can continue an dhopefully teams will still sign you even if you were pretty bad during your few minutes of play (I honestly thought you'd be getting 20 minutes a game and play 3 - 4 games out of 5).
  19. Aussie Baller
    19. Posted by Aussie Baller Thu Sep 03, 2009 8:40 pm EDT

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    Come on guys the guys sounds stressed and is heart is not in to writing at this stage. The poor guys is injured and we all know how it feels when you are injured especially at a critical time like summer league. Mate don't worry about NBA and go to Europe or even come to Australia and start making some reall cash .... Good luck in wateva you do !
  20. chart3
    20. Posted by chart3 Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:22 pm EDT

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    first time visitor, first time poster. this blog was pretty good and ended well with the dollar bill trick story and video. i had to chuckle out loud and think of all the (dumb) girls i've known and am now trying to avoid that this trick would work on or at least give them an excuse errr.... reason to not be so unecessarily [profane]y. good one rod.
  21. chart3
    21. Posted by chart3 Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:22 pm EDT

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    didn't realize this was yahoo at first... should have typed in b**chy.
  22. Ben T
    22. Posted by Ben T Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:56 pm EDT

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    In there like swimwear. BOOM THO!
    cant wait to see u tearing it up man!
  23. Lan
    23. Posted by Lan Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:50 pm EDT

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    Hey Rod! You know what? You got talent....Use it before it's too late..Go somewhere in Europe where you can earn a lot..It would be nice to try and use your skills..Then go back after a year or two..Big time!! Look at Childress...
  24. Slobodan Chutzpah
    24. Posted by Slobodan Chutzpah Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:28 pm EDT

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    Rod, pay no mind to these whiners. Just keep up the good work -- this one made me smile.
  25. nykeedunks
    25. Posted by nykeedunks Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:42 pm EDT

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    fool, was that a JAGER bottle????
    hahaha...whatever its Vegas. lol.

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