Thu Aug 05 11:00am EDT
Way back in 2006 — during the preballdontlieic period — the Utah Jazz retired Karl Malone's jersey. Makes sense, considering he is the best player in Jazz history. Totally normal so far.
To honor their superstar power forward, the Jazz hosted a charity roast of Malone featuring videos from Shaquille O'Neal(notes), Charles Barkley and country music singer Neal McCoy, whose "Last of a Dying Breed" served as the roast's theme. Things are getting weirder, since Karl Malone isn't a guy you usually associate with joking around and having fun. If the Jazz had hosted a charity weightlifting demonstration, that would make total sense. Even an anti-fashion show, with models in stonewashed jeans and tiny ties, would be more logical.
Then, at the roast, Jazz general manager Frank Layden pulled out an enormous jock strap, called it Karl Malone's and put it on his head to finish his time at the podium.
Yep, that's a 70-something NBA executive with a huge prop athletic supporter on his head making jokes about a Rogaine-endorsing, country music-loving NBA player who dresses like a cowboy and wrestled for WCW in shiny purple pants. I don't really "get" Utah.