Ball Don't Lie - NBA

A little more than two months ago, news leaked that Shaquille O'Neal(notes) might have a lawsuit brought against him for computer hacking. Just the idea of it — Shaq as a complex technological genius who is capable of masterminding computer hacking schemes — is quite outlandish. But, as it turns out, it's not so crazy. Well, it's still crazy, but in a completely different way because the lawsuit has been filed and the details are bananacakes.

Radar has the deets of the lawsuit, which will probably make your brain explode from craziness.

Shaq's former employee Shawn Darling filed the suit for intentional infliction of emotional distress, invasion of privacy and civil R.I.C.O. (a racketeering charge) on August 3, in Miami-Dade County, Florida.

Here are some of the explosive allegations:

* Shaq hacked into the voicemails and phone systems of Darling and Vanessa Lopez, a mistress who is currently suing O'Neal. He deleted Lopez's messages and changed her password.
* O'Neal used his law enforcement contacts, both active and retired, to obtain restricted information about one of his mistresses, Alexis Miller, while he was involved in a legal battle with her.
* Shaq threw a personal computer holding much of this evidence in the lake behind his home.
* Shaq conspired with active law enforcement as well as ex-members of law enforcement to frame Darling for a criminal offense and destroy any evidence that Darling might have against O'Neal.

Darling says there is proof in the form of emails, text messages and photos that Shaq had multiple affairs while married and tried to keep that information from going public.

OK, so I guess maybe Shaquille O'Neal really is a computer mastermind? Like, a regular Kevin Mitnick, I suppose. Set up your firewalls, because Shaq's hacking everybody out here.

Who knows how much of these allegations are true — Shaq's accuser has an extensive criminal background, in case you were wondering — but they are pretty intense. There's the hacking, the destruction of property, and there's even accusations that Shaq used his police connections to try to get his accuser thrown in jail. Plus, Shaq might have thrown a laptop in a lake which is something straight out of a "Zoolander" outtake. If any or all of this is true, Shaq could be in big, big trouble (not a fat joke, for real).

So yeah — Shaquille O'Neal, possible computer hacking mastermind. Who would have guessed that, ever?

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