Ball Don't Lie - NBA

Ball Don't Lie

Wed Apr 09, 2008 3:30 pm EDT

Now you, too, can have a Baron Davis-like beard

By J.E. Skeets

Are you sick of prepubescent mustaches? Is not being able to grow a beard ruining your pathetic, wretched life? Do you look like Jiri Welsch? (Nods heavily.) Well, worry no longer! Introducing Fear The Beard's PaperBeard™ ...


Yes, put away those dangerous testosterone pills. With FTB's PaperBeard™, now you, too, can sport a thick full beard just like Golden State Warriors guard Baron Davis. And all it takes is four easy steps. Just download the PaperBeard™ .pdf file, print it out, cut around the dotted lines, add some string, and ... VOILA! You're ready for your very own playoff run!

So, what are you waiting for? Download your very own PaperBeard™ today! Fear The Beard's bandwidth is (hopefully) standing by.

[Note: I feel horrible about not posting this sooner. I'm positive it would've been enough to push B-Diddy past Marko Jaric's supermodel boo in last week's Bedlam Final Four match-up. Oh well.]

digg delicious
more

24 Comments

Post a Comment
  1. Pacoveli Vega
    1. Posted by Pacoveli Vega Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:48 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    sweet. We need one of these for that Damon Jones Mohawk, too. hahahah
  2. J.E. Skeets
    2. Posted by J.E. Skeets Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:33 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    It's a shame Cleveland didn't do this last year with Drew Gooden's neckstache.
  3. the REAL Headless Chicken
    3. Posted by the REAL Headless Chicken Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:12 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Great, except for the french you use. What does Viola have to do with this? She's such a sweetheart. Voila, there you go. Canadian??? ;)
  4. J.E. Skeets
    4. Posted by J.E. Skeets Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:33 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    J.B.: The "viola" is a lovely instrument. (Thx.)
  5. Daniel T
    5. Posted by Daniel T Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:35 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Dude, the beard movement started long before Rick Ross.
  6. Dan
    6. Posted by Dan Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:35 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    That beard is sick!!!
  7. theboss
    7. Posted by theboss Thu Sep 03, 2009 8:42 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Travis Diener's got a better beard
  8. Daniel T
    8. Posted by Daniel T Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:35 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Travis Diener could get taken to the rack and smashed on by the paper beard.
  9. Archit
    9. Posted by Archit Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:57 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Baron Davis is the best PG in the NBA by far. Forget Kobe, CP3, KG, and James. This guy is the best. I dont know why he isnt in the MVP race cuz he definetly led the "nobody" warriors to the playoffs and will do it again.
    Also, the NBA should start a new award, the MIFH- Most Interesting Facial Hair, lol
  10. Willie S
    10. Posted by Willie S Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:46 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    drew gooden didnt have a neckstache its called a shag
  11. Erwin Ronan P
    11. Posted by Erwin Ronan P Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:56 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    I miss the former hairdos and moustache/beard dos of scott pollard.
  12. Older_than_Moses_Shaq
    12. Posted by Older_than_Moses_Shaq Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:56 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Some of us actually have enough testosterone to grow our own.
  13. marc
    13. Posted by marc Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:06 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Hey! Erwin I agree Pollard was fun as hell, with his interesting do's, Sigh, it just isn't the same is it? MJ take some youth drugs we need you Magic, Bird, and Barkley back, it sucks without you guys! None of these guys sported beards as interesting as Baron though! LOL
  14. 408
    14. Posted by 408 Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:16 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    hell yaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats dope
  15. haha
    15. Posted by haha Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:14 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Jarics wife was a cheap shot
  16. jesco44@...
    16. Posted by jesco44@... Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:33 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    scott pollard is the MAN!!!!!!
  17. J-D
    17. Posted by J-D Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:31 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Maybe someone will make a paper copy of Lima's "secret garden" so all those horny 13-year-olds can pretend they're having the sex they would never get from her in a thousand years.
  18. HaGuy
    18. Posted by HaGuy Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:02 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    no longer do i fear the beard. for as long as i have adobe reader, i shall not want.
  19. Daniel T
    19. Posted by Daniel T Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:35 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Beard it up tomorrow, Bay Area!
    http://www.fearthebeard.org/2008/04/10/now-more-than-ever-beard-up-for-denver-tough-times-call-for-the-paperbeard™/
  20. wally a
    20. Posted by wally a Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:40 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    If that's the case someone should sport a Ben Wallace' fro on ther faces...
  21. Plo
    21. Posted by Plo Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:46 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    Damn! This is SOOO sweet! Warriors are SOOO gonna beat the Nuggets, and all beacause of The Bearded Baron!
  22. Scotty B
    22. Posted by Scotty B Thu Sep 03, 2009 9:10 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    "Baron Davis is the best PG in the NBA by far. Forget Kobe, CP3, KG, and James. This guy is the best. I dont know why he isnt in the MVP race cuz he definetly led the "nobody" warriors to the playoffs and will do it again."
    B-davis is great (and ONE of the best PG's (nash, better pure shooter.. jkidd, he-triple-double) but he didn't do as much for his team as kobe, paul, kg or lebron did. Sorry, but i'd personally give the warriors' mvp to monta ellis
  23. Daniel T
    23. Posted by Daniel T Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:35 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    This isn't about who you want to sleep with. It was a single elimination tournament to determine the best cultural components of NBA Basketball, no? Lima's fine as hell, but is anyone going to remember her connection to the league in 10 years? Meanwhile, BD is to beards as Jordan was to the bald head. Not the first. Maybe not even the best example (Slick Watts anyone?). But the cat who put the look--and the intimidation that went along with it--on the map.
  24. Petey
    24. Posted by Petey Thu Sep 03, 2009 8:07 pm EDT

    Report Abuse

    The beards stem from Philly! not Rick Ross not B Diddy. Great Pg though wouldnt say he's better than CP3 or Nash. BUt I think every comment I read on here was pretty lame!!! Anyone remember Jay-Z " gotta kill the witnesses cuz Free beard stickin out?" It satarted in Philly everyone else get over it

Ball Don't Lie

Add to My Yahoo! RSS

J.E. Skeets

Ball Don't Lie is an NBA blog edited by J.E. Skeets. Email him, and follow him on Twitter.

Contributors:
Kelly Dwyer, Rod Benson, Trey Kerby, Dan Devine, Adrian Wojnarowski & Marc J. Spears,

Teams

Customize to follow news and rumors on your favorite teams. [ Sign in ]

Related Photo Gallery

More NBA Photos »

Y! Sports Blogs

Ball Don't Lie Recent Readers

(provided by MyBlogLog)