Ball Don't Lie - NBA

76ers guard Jrue Holiday(notes) speaks with children during a Thanksgiving event at The Children's Home in Mount Holly, New Jersey. Best caption wins some airline food. Good luck.

After the jump, plate ump Dwight calls safe.

Winner, Hugging Harold Reynolds:
"What do you mean Twitter suspended my account for suspicious activity?!"

Co-runner-up, JM:
DH: "Hey, Jameer, you got the hiccups, man? Well look at this ... SCARY BEAR!!! [leaps out at JN]
JN: [tears cartilege in knee, tears labrum, craps pants -- out 4-6 weeks]

Co-runner-up, Brocktoon:
Howard's latest alterego, "Sumo-Dwight," might not take with American audiences as easily as Superman, but hey, Benihana's endorsement money goes a long way in a state with no personal income tax.

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74 Comments

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  1. Peter D
    1. Posted by Peter D Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:46 pm EST

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    Jrue: "Kids, dont play basketball. They make you pump gas"
  2. Serouj
    2. Posted by Serouj Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:49 pm EST

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    1st?!? cool...
  3. Richard
    3. Posted by Richard Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:51 pm EST

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    "Do any of you even know who I am?"
  4. Uncle Stanley McGoober
    4. Posted by Uncle Stanley McGoober Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:53 pm EST

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    Hey is that a fruit rollup? I'll trade you my microphone, this 76ers flag, and....Elton Brand!!!
  5. kingbill
    5. Posted by kingbill Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:55 pm EST

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    No No I'm telling you for the last time there's no D, it's Jr...
  6. Ol' Leather Pumpkin
    6. Posted by Ol' Leather Pumpkin Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:56 pm EST

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    "No I'm not related to Matt Holliday, Roy Halliday, or Dionte Christmas. Next question, please."
  7. Mighty McLovin
    7. Posted by Mighty McLovin Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:59 pm EST

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    No, I am not Dave Chapelle, and I refuse to amuse kids with a 76ers block party..
  8. devin c
    8. Posted by devin c Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:00 pm EST

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    Moderator: "Ok Mr. Holiday, your word is 'Hydration'"
    Jrue: "Hydration. H-Y-J-R-A..."
    *DING*
  9. indeedproceed
    9. Posted by indeedproceed Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:06 pm EST

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    Jrue: "....and that was the third time I got crabs. Any other questions? Yes you, the kid in the blue hoodie from Mrs. Peterson's fourth grade class. "
  10. Robert C
    10. Posted by Robert C Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:06 pm EST

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    "Hey kids, if you can't handle a year of college...you can always go play in Europe"
  11. TheChosenOne
    11. Posted by TheChosenOne Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:12 pm EST

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    Holiday: "And that is why i think you should vote for me for president in 2012"
  12. dwyanesdigs
    12. Posted by dwyanesdigs Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:13 pm EST

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    Jrue: "Like Hannukah? No no, its JRue, dammit!"
  13. Greg W
    13. Posted by Greg W Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:13 pm EST

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    "Allen Iverson?! What are you doing back here?!"
  14. Greg W
    14. Posted by Greg W Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:14 pm EST

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    devin c's already won.
  15. ChaoticImpulse11
    15. Posted by ChaoticImpulse11 Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:26 pm EST

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    "AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII, WILL ALWAYS LOOOOOOVVVVVVEEEEEE YOUUUUUU!" (Whitney Houston I will always love you song plays in the background")
  16. MOSScomeBACK2vikes
    16. Posted by MOSScomeBACK2vikes Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:27 pm EST

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    #8 should win. devin c that was hilarious! HAHAHAHA
  17. gaborik10m
    17. Posted by gaborik10m Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:35 pm EST

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    yep, 8 took that one down...everyone else stop.
  18. Sean D
    18. Posted by Sean D Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:38 pm EST

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    Yes... I was supposed to be the only black guy at that party. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWhhPWyWCv0)
  19. magik_trick
    19. Posted by magik_trick Fri Nov 20, 2009 2:52 pm EST

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    Its so empty in here....reminds me of being the last one in the green room!
  20. Robert C
    20. Posted by Robert C Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:17 pm EST

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    I second, third or fourth that Devin C has this one.
  21. RICK JAMES
    21. Posted by RICK JAMES Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:18 pm EST

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    Jrue: Did you see the a$$ on that white women? Dam Chris Duhon is so lucky.
  22. Phil
    22. Posted by Phil Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:19 pm EST

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    Hey, kids, what's the difference between your NBA career and mine? About 47 minutes!
  23. KneeJerkNBA
    23. Posted by KneeJerkNBA Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:29 pm EST

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    "You on point, Tip?"
    crowd answers back "All the time, Phife."
  24. kuato lives
    24. Posted by kuato lives Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:46 pm EST

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    Jrue: Hi, everyone, my name is Jrue
    Crowd: Hi Jrue!!!
    Jrue: Hi..I'm here today because I'm addicted to marijuana
    Guy in Crowd: Argg..you're in here for marijuana?! MARIJUANA!?
    Bob Saget: Marijuana's not a drug. I used to [profane] for coke. You ever [profane] for marijuana?
    Jrue: Uhh...No, I can't say I have
    Bob Saget: That's what I thought
    Guy in Crowd: Boo this man!!!!
    Crowd: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
  25. Bibz
    25. Posted by Bibz Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:49 pm EST

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    ...and in conclusion, kids. Remember, trying is the first step to failure.

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