Ball Don't Lie - NBA

Rockets head coach Rick Adelman recites some Shakespeare to his team against the Bobcats at Time Warner Cable Arena in Charlotte on Tuesday. Best caption wins a new-age calculator watch. Good luck.

After the jump, Mr. Howard huddles the troops.

Winner, omar:
"And remember, before you call a timeout, make sure you actually have one left ..."

Co-runner-up, Andrew:
Howard: "My story begins in nineteen-dickety-two. We had to say 'dickety' because the Kaiser had stolen our word 'twenty.' I chased that rascal to get it back, but gave up after dickety-six miles ...
Roy: "See what I have to deal with now that half of my team is injured?"
Cunningham: "The doctor told me I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of there ..."
Roy: "Somebody ... please help."

Co-runner-up, Ol' Leather Pumpkin:
As scrappy as the Blazers are, their injury-depleted roster can't win any Barber Shop Quartet Championships without Greg Oden's(notes) sultry baritone.

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