Ball Don't Lie - NBA

I can see why you'd think that Omer Asik(notes) is a mask-wearing villain, Kris Humphries(notes). He's an imposing physical specimen from a far-flung land about whom American fans still know very little. Plus, he's always stealing extra possessions — 16 rebounds on Thursday night, including nine offensive caroms in slightly more than a half of basketball off the bench — and stealing is pretty dastardly. And his last name reminds us all of The Iron Sheik, who perpetrated a great many unkindnesses against WWF faces during the 1980s. It definitely checks out.

But as you can clearly see, that is not a mask, Kris Humphries. And he's going to keep getting away with those rebounds, no matter how much meddling you New Jersey Nets kids do.

Best caption wins a pretty chill theme song, all things considered. Good luck.

In our last adventure: Jason Kidd(notes) loses possession of the basketball in a way that makes me laugh, because I have the emotional maturity of a 12-year-old.

Winner, B. How: Given Kidd's age, maybe a surprise party wasn't such a good idea.

Runner-up, Forbs: Jason Kidd loses control of the ball after seeing how silky smooth and fresh European armpits are.

Second runner-up, El Du: "Whatever. You guys can put your hands up, but I'm hangin' tough down here."

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