February 14, 2011
Goodness me, you are incorrigible, Scottie Pippen! Always scooting up to Maine every chance you get, hanging out with guys who look like Rich Rodriguez, trying to shoot biathlon rifles during the International Biathlon Union (IBU) Biathlon World Cup, and just smiling, smiling, smiling away. Whatever are we going to do with you?
Probably nothing, on account of that rifle you're holding. You scamp, you.
Best caption wins the secret of life whispered to you by former IBU President Igor Novikov as people ski by and shoot things. Good luck.
In our last adventure: Pacers coach Frank Vogel would just like a moment of your time.
Winner, EJ: "I'll take this team to the playoffs ... since no one else in the East wants to go."
Runner-up, Russell S: Vogel: "One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do ... Two can be as bad as one / It's the loneliest number since the number one ..."
Referee: "Double technical on Indiana bench! Excessive use of Three Dog Night!"
NOTE: Should've used Aimee Mann.
Second runner-up, mr. jones: "I'll have a solid rebounder and a sharp 3-pointer shooter, to go, please."