Ball Don't Lie - NBA

Little-known fact: When you add an extraneous punctuation mark/special character to your name, it decreases your hearing by 10 percent. That's the only reason you're not reading a post by D;@n Dev*in%, which was my alias on the alt.rec.arts.tv.punky.brewster newsgroup.

We don't know what newsgroups Amar'e Stoudemire(notes) frequented (I'm guessing he was heavy on the "Babylon 5" threads), but we do know he's rockin' an extr' apost' and that he had some trouble understanding what the crowd had to say when the New York Knicks played the Denver Nuggers at the Pepsi Center on Tuesday night. Care to help him out? Best caption wins some soywax ear candles (NOTE: not really), because you've got to keep 'em clean, gents. Good luck.

In our last adventure: Tracy McGrady makes another entry in his headache diary.


Winner, Antonio Banderas: T-Mac tries to remember the Pistons' rotation.

Runner-up, Carlos: Tracy McGrady(notes) is now realizing he averages one point every six minutes. (NOTE: According to Basketball-Reference, it's actually one point every four minutes. Jeez, get it together, will you, Carlos?)

Second runner-up, craigerswuzhere: "I can't believe I have to work Thanksgiving and Christmas this year!"

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