Thu Jul 08 11:50pm EDT
As you can imagine, players leaving a team can leave that team pretty upset. Especially when that team is the only team the player has ever played for and the player grew up 45 minutes from the city where the team is located. If you haven't figured it out yet, this is about LeBron James(notes), and the Cleveland Cavaliers and their owner, Dan Gilbert, who seems to be pretty upset with James' decision.
He's written an open letter to Cavaliers fans and it is, in a word, cramazing (crazy + amazing). It's an absolute evisceration of LeBron James and you need to read it in its entirety immediately. However, because I'm a nice guy, here are the best parts of it.
As you now know, our former hero, who grew up in the very region that he deserted this evening, is no longer a Cleveland Cavalier.
OK, that's a pretty mild burn, but a burn nonetheless.
It gets better.
You simply don't deserve this kind of cowardly betrayal.
You have given so much and deserve so much more.
Yikes. This is the owner of an NBA team saying this.
Let's go on.
"I PERSONALLY GUARANTEE THAT THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS WILL WIN AN NBA CHAMPIONSHIP BEFORE THE SELF-TITLED FORMER ‘KING' WINS ONE"
I'd love to take credit for the all-caps and the bold, but that's all Gilbert. He's pretty serious about this.
Oh, there's more.
Some people think they should go to heaven but NOT have to die to get there.
Sorry, but that's simply not how it works.
Preach, Dan Gilbert!
The self-declared former "King" will be taking the "curse" with him down south. And until he does "right" by Cleveland and Ohio, James (and the town where he plays) will unfortunately own this dreaded spell and bad karma.
Holy smokes, that's insane. And as Dan Devine noted, it's all in Comic Sans font which makes this even more unbelievable. Go read this whole thing three or four times, keeping in mind that the actual owner of an NBA team wrote this and posted it on the Internet. It's incredible.
Dan Gilbert must have missed his nap today.