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Ball Don't Lie - NBA

Ball Don't Lie

Tue Aug 12, 2008 1:00 pm EDT

Best. Team USA headline. Ever.

By J.E. Skeets

'Wade Keeps Dwyaneing His Shots' is the actual sports ticker headline in play at the KXNet.com North Dakota News site. Amazing. Now, is it a better headline than, say, 'Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Space'? No, not even close. But is it better than 'Drunks Get Nine Months in Violin Case'? I say, yes, just slightly. The pun is wonderful. Feel free to add your favorite newspaper headlines, sports-related or not, in the comments below.

Related: USA Basketball

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9 Comments

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  1. Devine
    1. Posted by Devine Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:39 pm EDT

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    In Dec. 2006, one of the GateHouse papers (I think it originated in the Milford Daily News, then moved up to the Boston Herald) ran a story with the headline: "Kid fights off hawk to save dog." I love how simple, evocative and active it is -- it's like a live-action Disney movie wrapped up in seven words. Sadly, the version now up on the Daily News' site is "Boy battles hawk to save pup" -- yes, it's more succinct, but it lacks some of the brashness of the original.
  2. mcwelk
    2. Posted by mcwelk Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:14 pm EDT

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    It's official, you're circling the Dwyane.
  3. Roger
    3. Posted by Roger Thu Sep 03, 2009 8:09 pm EDT

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    "Lobster Catches Shrink," in the Toronto Star, late 90s
  4. birch n
    4. Posted by birch n Thu Sep 03, 2009 3:08 pm EDT

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    In the 80's, the U. of Michigan basketball team played the David Robinson-led Navy team in the first round of the NCAA. The school newspaper editor writing the headline clearly had balls, but they weren't THAT big, because the following headline appeared not on the front page introducing the story, but rather on the inside, where the story continued: "Michigan Creams Sea-Men." Doesn't get any better than that.
  5. Rob
    5. Posted by Rob Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:26 pm EDT

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    The best part of this story is the first line where they show you how to pronounce Dwayne by just removing the "e".
  6. MDS
    6. Posted by MDS Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:18 pm EDT

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    Chris boshs first trip to the Great Wall
    Kidd looks old
    Boozer drains a few, looks shaky
  7. dubya
    7. Posted by dubya Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:45 pm EDT

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    lebron and dwayne are good but f spain and those beaners for the fiasco they pulled in that picture may they rest in piss
  8. dodgerblues
    8. Posted by dodgerblues Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:13 pm EDT

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    "LOS ANGELES HAPPY TO SEE MANNY-WOOD"
    hahaha that was hilarious
  9. Tharun Cheriyan
    9. Posted by Tharun Cheriyan Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:34 pm EDT

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    hi

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J.E. Skeets

Ball Don't Lie is an NBA blog edited by J.E. Skeets. Email him, and follow him on Twitter.

Contributors:
Kelly Dwyer, Rod Benson, Trey Kerby, Nick Friedell, Garbage Time All-Stars, Blair Johnson,

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