June 17, 2008
Meech says he's going to try and post some video of said ape dancing on the dugout during his lunch break, but until then, let me offer you this piece of advice: Buying an ape costume is never a bad investment.
Back in my high school days, I pooled some money with my friends and bought a monkey costume with the more traditional black hair (fur?) Not only did it get us through several Halloweens, costume parties and unannounced appearances in front of parents, but it also got us a lot of mileage in some unexpected arenas.
When my friend, Polish Joe, didn't have a date to senior year homecoming, one of our other friends dressed up as the ape and attended the dance as Joe's date. We have the formal picture (somewhere) to prove it.
When we all went to an early season college basketball tournament at the United Center, one of us dressed as the ape and was immediately confused for an official tournament mascot. If you review footage of that year's Kentucky-Purdue basketball game, you'll see that the halftime entertainment for 20,000 people consisted of the Kentucky Wildcat, Purdue Pete and a rogue primate from the western suburbs.
I've often wondered what happened to that ape costume — the faux fur (hair?) started to smell like a hockey locker room — and I've often thought about buying another one. With the All-Star Game and Big League Stew planning to take Manhattan on a mid-summer road trip, perhaps now is as good a time as any to get back into the game. (Only $158.10 + shipping!)
Press conference moderator: "Mr. Francona, our next question comes from the man dressed as a pink gorilla in the back of the room. Mr. Pink Gorilla, please go ahead."
Awesome.*(In case you're wondering, yes, I just wrote almost an entire post about gorilla costumes. I love my job.)