This and every weekday morning let's rise and shine together with the latest happenings in the major league world of baseball. Today's Roll Call starts in the Lone Star State, where Marlon Byrd ended the WoW hopes and dreams of our substitute squeezers by not trying to draw a walk and bashing the ball over the center field wall for a grand slam instead.  

As they did on Monday ( and will through Thursday), Rob Iracane and Camp Tiger Claw of Walkoff Walk have the call. 

Game Of The Day: Rangers 9, Yankees 5

What's Up, Creampuff?: Joba Chamberlain cruised through his first 3 innings against the hard hitting University of Washington Rangers. After giving up a 2-run homer to David Murphy in the fourth he then surrendered a 3-run job to Michael Young in the fifth. Later in that inning trainers ran out to check on Chamberlain. Apparently more than his feelings were hurt as he left the game with a stiff shoulder.

Rocket From The Crypt: The launching pad in Arlington was especially homery last evening. The game featured tots from 6 different players. None of whom were born in '69. Of course the most important belonged to Marlon Byrd. After Damaso Marte walked the bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth, Byrd deprived you all of another shrimp video by jacking one into right. Oh well, can't WoW 'em all.

Any Of You Guys Pitch?: Let's assume the worst on Chamberlain. Not because I'm a sicko, but because it gives me something to write about. Wang is out for the year, and the trade deadline has come and gone. Help is ostensibly on the way with Carl Pavano (!) and Phil Hughes both on rehab assignments. I say ostensibly because who knows exactly what those guys will bring to the table, and also because I want you to have to look up the definition. If Chamberlain misses any time this rotation becomes a very iffy proposition.

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Feelin' Rundown (Monday's other games):

Angels 6, Orioles 5 — Wait, what? Out on the West Coast, George Sherrill walked Chone Figgins with the bases loaded in the ninth? Praise be! Normally, this would have set WoW into an instant wild celebration, except it was sleeping. I emailed Tim Kurkjian to find out the last time two teams won on walkoff walks in two consecutive days and he never wrote back. The joke's on him, though, because I stole his garden gnome. Cue the shrimp! (Enjoy his intricacies!)

Astros 2, Cubs 0 (8 Final) — Houston won the game, but the real winners were the thousands of people in Wrigley who managed to survive the wild storms. Also a winner (somehow): Brian Moehler.

Reds 6, Brewers 3 — Strange night in Cincinnati. The Redlegs were running a $5 ticket, $1 Hot Dog promotion to get people to come to the ballpark. Well, apparently the increased meat and nitrate consumption incensed vegetarian Prince Fielder because he went after his own pitcher in the dugout. My boy, Manny Parra, did not have one of his best outings giving up 6 ER in six innings. Matters were made worse when Fielder ambushed him after Parra was lifted for a pinch hitter. Come on guys, is that any way for a team with the 2007 Rookie Of The Year, Ryan Braun to act? It's almost as if Ned Yost has lost control of the team. You mean the same Ned Yost that was all but fired a month into the season? Makes sense to me. Oh yeah, Bronson Arroyo pitched well and Jay Bruce had a ding dong and 2 RBI.

Blue Jays 6, A's 1 — Hey, so much for the A's being a second half team, huh? At this point they couldn't beat you in a game of Candy Land. Five different Blue Jays knocked in runs. Meanwhile, Roy Halladay continues to be the meanest, orneriest character in the American League and maybe in baseball. He went 8 innings, striking out the same number and allowing but 5 Athletics to reach base. I'm going to give him the current lead in the AL Cy Young race over ...

Indians 5, Rays 2 — ...Cliff Lee. Lee turned in another solid performance, scattering 8 hits and 2 runs over 7 innings. He tied the Brandon Webb for the MLB lead with 15 wins, if you're into that kind of thing. Asdrubal Cabrera and Dave Dellucci each had home runs off Matt Garza and Kelly Shoppach pitched in with two ribbies. The Rays dropped to 47-18 at home so it's a good thing attendance was a paltry 17,049. GET WITH IT, TAMPA!

Royals 4, Red Sox 3 — The $55M Man, Gil Meche (not Mache) won his fourth straight start helping the Royals take their seventh victory in eight games. Alex Gordon hit a solo funny bone off of Clay Buchholz. But, the Sox did not go quietly into that good night against Joakim "The Mexicutioner" Soria. They loaded the bases and scored a run on a bumbling Keystone Cops infield hit from Jason Bay that I can't believe wasn't called an error. Sean Casey eventually flew out to end the game. Shucks.

Nationals 9, Rockies 4 — 2007 NL Rookie of the Year runner-up Troy Tulowitzki and pitcher Aaron Cook each contributed an error for the Rox, leading to three unearned runs for Cook. You won't get win No. 15 throwing two wild pitches either, Aaron.

Diamondbacks 13, Pirates 7 — Danny Haren has gone over twenty-four innings without walking a batter. In related news, David Wells has somehow gone over twenty-four weeks without bathing in pancake batter.

Giants 4, Braves 2 — Former face of the franchise Matt Cain finally found fulfillment in the fog, winning his seventh game on the year over a reeling Atlanta club (who stink on the road.)

Mariners 11, Twins 6 — Seattle drops a ten spot in the seventh, letting Kenny G fan Miguel Batista and his six runs allowed off the hook.

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Photo of the Day: Hurt on the Joba

I told you not to drink that Slurpee so fast, homey.

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Fantasy Freaks

Roy Halladay (Blue Jays) 8 IP, 1 ER, 8 K, Win

Raul Ibanez (Mariners) 3-for-5, HR, 6 RBI

Marlon Byrd (Rangers) 2-for-4, HR, 4 RBI

Willie Harris (Nationals) 2-for-5, HR, 3 RBI

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Fantasy Flakes

Tyler Yates (Pirates) 0.1 IP, 5 ER

Lance Berkman (Astros) 0-for-4, 2 K

Ivan Rodriguez (Yankees) 0-for-4, 2 LOB

J.J. Hardy (Brewers) 0-for-5, 2 K, 2 LOB

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Words of Mouth

"That was fun. I felt like I was slow as molasses, but I got there in time." — Matt Cain on hustling his buns around third to score his third run of 2008.