Big League Stew - MLB

If there's anything more American than shooting and throwing encased meats into a throng of loud and hungry people, it's silly-sounding lawsuits that make for good headlines on Internet websites. 

And, well, hot dog! Wouldn't you know that we're finally receiving a beautiful combination of the two?

According to a lawsuit filed in Jackson County, Missouri, a Kansas City Royals fan is suing the team for $25,000 for negligence and battery.

Mind you, those charges aren't for the Royals averaging 98 losses over the last six seasons or signing Jason Kendall(notes) in the offseason.

No, they're for an alleged incident in which the team's crown-wearing mascot Sluggerrr — in case you can't tell, that's him on the right — threw a hot dog into the crowd and hit a man named John Coomer in the eye behind the third-base dugout at a game last September. attacks the details with relish:

"Coomer claims Sluggerrr eventually put the (hot dog) air gun down — and started firing off the wieners by hand ... when, according to the suit, things went horribly wrong.

"In the docs, Coomer claims "Slugger lost control of his throw or was reckless with his throw, and threw the hotdog directly into the Plaintiff."

"Coomer claims the dog hit him right in his left eye — leaving him with a detached retina and the development of cataracts."

If I've said it before, I'll say it again: Letting a costumed critter distribute wieners is all bun and games until somebody gets hurt. Also, watching one of your customers get injured via a projected lunch from a Simba wannabe simply isn't kosher in the ballpark business.

Coomer's case claims that the Royals "failed to adequately train its agents ... in the proper method in which to throw hotdogs into the stands at Kauffman Stadium." Meanwhile, it now seems curious that the Royals advertised the open position of Sluggerrr for the 2010 season a few months back. (Was the opening related to this incident?)

At any rate, we came up with 10 qualifications for people interested in the job when it was posted. Perhaps we should add "pitching lessons from Zack Greinke(notes)" to our requirements?

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