November 11, 2008
Several sources have reported that CC Sabathia spoke with Derek Jeter, the Yankees captain, about becoming one of the Bronx Bombers once free agency opens on Friday. In speaking with reporters, Jeter disclosed very little about the talk, other than that Sabathia "asked questions about" the team that wants to pay him a very large sum of money.
Here, possibly, are the questions that Sabathia wanted answers for:
10. "Mr. Steinbrenner's not gonna make me try on his turtleneck collection to test my Yankee loyalty, is he?"
9. "Tell me what you think, and be honest: Periods... no periods? Periods... no periods? Periods... no periods?"
8. "Say, do you have Jessica Alba's, Vanessa Minnillo's, Jordana Brewster's, Vida Guerra's, Scarlett Johansson's, Adriana Lima's, Gabrielle Union's, Mariah Carey's and Jessica Biel's cell phone number?"
7. "Ponson's not going to be there when I get there, is he?
6. "You know in your G2 commercial, where you talk about folks watching game highlights in 'slow-mo, fast-mo, and every kind of '-mo' there is'? What in God's name are you talking about?"
5. "Think I'll fit in considering my A-Rod-like playoff results?"
4. "Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?"
3. "You gonna eat your fries?"
2. "Will you please stop spritzing me with your damn cologne, nancy boy?"
1. "Do these pinstripes make my butt look less fat?"